Chapter 21 || Take Me Home

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Chapter 21 || Take Me Home

There are moments in your life that you'll never forget, the beautiful, the horrid, the utterly unique. All of these things have a purpose to make you into the person you are at this single, one moment in your life.

Fortunately for me the only totally horrid thing that I experienced was failing my grade twelve chem exam.

Most of my experiences were happy, there were the hard times, sure. But it was the strong family unit, the good friends, and every other little thing that helped me through those times.

I never really experienced anything bad until these past events occurred in my life.

I almost felt like I was the eye of a dartboard, and everyone had the greatest luck to hit right there, the small little dot in the middle of everything, me.

Maybe I was over exaggerating.

I mean compared to most I still had it pretty good.

At least I wasn't put into slavery or anything.

But I guess, when put into perspective, everyone thinks that their pain is worse than others, because no one really knows the pain that you are going through, so no one can truly know whose is worse than another.

Yikes, since when did I get so deep?

No but seriously. I don't know, I guess what has happened to me, to some might consider it minor when compared to someone else's experiences.

I guess what I am trying to say is that what happened with Noah had a big impact on me, not because it was one of the worst things to ever happen in this world, but it was one of the worst things that has happened with me. And that can resonate with someone

Noah didn't rape me, but it was leading there, and it could have happened.

Every part of this weird relationship that we had going on I was always able to have some control in some aspect of it. I kind of knew that I was always able to really stop those moments from happening if I really meant to.

But that moment; yesterday in the car. There was no control, i wasn't able to stop anything from happening. I was powerless.

Being powerless is probably the most terrifying thing in the world. Because you know that everything is up to someone else, and if that someone else is a monster, you are doomed.

I was sitting in the same bed that I was in just a few weeks prior.

Sitting and waiting.

Waiting for something.

Sitting and waiting.

Waiting for nothing.

Because that is what my life has dwindled to, nothing. As much as I had put up a barrier in my mind, and a big rich facade that things weren't going to be as awful as they were, well there was a moment when you had to break down those things and face the facts.

Because I had been lying to myself.

As much as I was negative, going on about death and all, I had been distracting myself, thinking of mundane things that could still connect me to my past life. Because right now, I don't have ties to them. They are all gone.

The truth of the situation was; Stiles wasn't going to be riding up in his beat up jeep. Stefan Salvatore wasn't going to save the day, and Captain Hook wasn't going to sweep me off my feet.

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