Crashing Into Blue

Chapter 32

After the dinner escapade with Davis, I'm left feeling as if I'm in some sort of familial limbo, a place where Davis is no longer a stranger but he's still light years off from being called a parental figure. It leaves me feeling off balance, as if I was hit by a wave I didn't see coming and salt water ended up spraying into my nose and into my mouth. But even though I saw this one coming, it still left me filled with a lingering sense of unease, and I don't think that I'm the only one feeling it. As I walk into the kitchen the morning after, hoping to grab the last bagel as I head out for work, I see Indigo standing in front of our farmhouse sink, letting the water from the faucet rinse her cereal bowl clean. I don't think she hears me enter the kitchen, because she doesn't turn to look at me; she just keeps gazing out the window. I only get her attention when I reach out from behind her to turn off the tap. She jumps in front of me, hands flying towards her face. When she realizes it's just me, she drops her hands back to her sides.

"What the hell!" she says to me as she turns around, grasping the counter behind her. "Are you trying to make me drop dead from a heart attack?"

"No, if I was trying to get rid of you I wouldn't go the medical emergency route; they could always revive you and then where would I be? I think I would trade you in to an exotic suitor for some llamas. You can't go back on a trade."

"llamas?"

"Yes, I think five llamas would be a fair trade."

"I'm only worth five llamas?"

"Hey, that's really good! I could make some serious money using their fur to make sweaters. You should be glad it's not five donkeys."

She rolls her eyes at me while tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. "I think you're thinking of alpacas, and you're being even weirder than usual today, which is saying a lot."

I grab the bagel out of the breadbasket, and wrap it in a paper towel as I shrug my shoulders at her.

"I'm not the one having a moody moment in front of the window, wasting all the water and acting like a cat on edge with its hackles raised."

She releases a breath as she leans back into the counter.

"I'm just feeling off from last night, it was so weird right? It's like he's trying to squeeze us into his new perfect family, only there isn't room for anyone else, never mind his two estranged twin children."

I nod along, suddenly feeling my throat tighten. I take a bite of my bagel, hoping to push the feeling down, but I can't seem to swallow over the lump in my throat.

Indigo makes her way out of the kitchen, speaking to me over her shoulder.

"I just don't get what he wants from us; he's gone for our entire lives, hiding behind his letters and his phone calls, and now he just materializes out of the blue? And what does he expect? For us to run at him and welcome him with open arms?" She scoffs as she reaches the threshold. "He needs to wake the fuck up; it was never going to be that easy." And with that, she's gone.

Suddenly losing my appetite, I put the bitten bagel back into the bread basket, knowing it will be gone by time I get home from work, most likely gobbled up by our mom while she runs into the kitchen to put fresh water into her paintbrush filled mason jar. She probably won't even notice the bite mark.