The Perfect Storm 3

Chapter 222

After staring at the paper in front of me, I still don't understand anything. Oh god. How could I do this to myself? I ponder the question over and over until I remember my mother's death, but nobody at college seems to care about life or death. Even after sending Mr. Stafford an email yesterday, he said he was sorry but that there was nothing he could do. I take deep breaths and I feel as if my need for letting the breaths go is as crucial as breathing but I can't seem to let any of the breaths go.

"Relax." I hear in a smooth tone, so smooth, it feels like it's cutting through me, releasing the air refuse to let go of.

"First question, 'nineteen', then, 'Wuthering heights.'" Miles says so calmly that no even the wind would be able to hear his tone.

I quickly write down whatever he's telling me and check in the answers that apply.

"Jane Austen, Seatle, grey, five . . . " Miles continues fast and I jot everything down. After telling me about ten more things, he stands up, grabbing his paper and glancing at me, making my heart do all kinds of things.

"No problem." He smirks and I feel the energy being drained out of my body as I stare at him and when I quickly pull away, the energy flows back to me. 

How does he do that to me?

I want to scream, I can't believe how I'm reacting to him. After everything. After he told me he wasn't ever attracted to me and now, he's pretending like it's our first time seeing each other. I know Stephanie told me that he admitted it wasn't true but it hurts, everything he said hurts so bad but then why can' I let go? Why can't I stop thinking about our life together, what it would feel like to just have him hold me in his arms, to visit lakes together, to move in together? I stop myself completely.

I find myself sprinting out of class and chasing after him.

"Miles!" I shout down the hallway and he turns around abruptly, I come to a complete halt when I'm a few feet away from him.

"Madison." He says calmly, and I can tell a smile is hiding behind those features. But I know his smile won't last long after what I'm about to do.

"I need you to have this back," I tell him quietly and then I hand him the one thing I don't want to let go of. 

He grabs the key from my hands and clenches his jaw hard. His eyes look bored now, unamused and angry even. I stare at them for only a split second because they burn so hard into mine. But when he turns around, I find myself craving him to look at me, so much I almost want to run to him but I can't let my emotions get to me. 

But they already have. They have gotten to me so badly. 

I wipe tears away from my eyes as I run in the other direction, qucikly finding my dorm, closing the door shut, and falling into my bed with the burning hot tears hurting my eyes as they fall down my cheeks and into the bedsheets.

Miles's POV

I've been silent the whole car ride home, so silent it's scary even to me. I haven't cussed anyone out, I haven't said a word, n fact, I've barely been breathing. As soon as my car hits the gravel of the front of my house, I speed up and then come to a violent halt, letting gravel shoot itself all over the place. Tire marks are burned deep into the pebble area but I don't give a shit. 

I let my feet run me up to the few stairs to the inside and when I get inside, I walk into the room with my old skool vans on and a smirk on my face. I throw the key at whatever is in front of me, I don't know where it landed but I don't care. 

Why the hell would I care? 

I see the same bowl I ate this morning on the kitchen counter and with one swift motion, I swipe it harshly off the table and it smashes into pieces on the damn floor. the broken glass crackle under my shoes as I step over it. 

I make my way to the living room and grab the TV, smashing it onto the ground as hard as I can and watching the screen crack into a million pieces, I start to slowly lose control and I welcome the feeling, I smash my first through the glass alcohol cabinet and watch as countless pieces of glass mold together and break almost at the same time. 

I take one drink, take one large sip and without a care in the fucking world, I throw it over my shoulder as if it's a dirty rag. I hear the satisfying break of glass behind me and after that, my vision turns black.

Madison's POV

I don't want to distance myself from Miles the way I'm doing and seeing the hurt in his eyes after giving him the key back, broke me. I'm not sure I want to do this, but I have to at least try. 

There are too many questions that need an answer and I can't find the answer if I'm influenced by him.

"Are you okay?" I hear Stephane's voice run into the room and I open my eyes, not having realized I had shut them in the first place.

"Mhm." I sniffle. I spot Elijah behind Stephanie and I feel bad, they were probably going to spend some time together and now Stephanie will have to take care of me instead of being with her boyfriend who is nice, so nice, he could be Jace.

"I'm sorry, babe." Stephanie turns to him.

"I gotcha." He winks at both of us and leaves, closing the door gently. I burst into tears, Miles would never be this kind, he will never change.

"He makes you cry when you're with him but he shouldn't make you cry when you're without him. What's going on Madison?" Stephanie's eyes are soft just like her tone. 

She's wearing Elijah's thick plain black sweater. I almost burst into tears again at the thought of it being so similar to something Miles owns but Stephanie is right. I have to keep it together.

"Come here." She says, letting me cuddle up beside her in my pajamas. Elijah's cologne lingers on the sweater, it's so different from anything I'm used to. But it's calming and I don't mind laying on her shoulder, letting my best friend comfort me.

"This isn't a loss you know . . ." Stephanie starts.

"What do you mean?" I ask her, my voice low and hurt from everything going on inside me.

"There's a party tomorrow, you should use this time without Miles, you know . . . get to know yourself, try new things, and new . . . boys. if you don't like it and if you even realize that Miles is the one, you let him be the one, but I won't let you give him any more chances than that, but it has to be the very last resort after everything else fails. Can you promise me that?" She asks firmly and I nod.

"Mhm," I say again.

"Can you do me a favor?" She asks and I nod.

"Anything," I say and by the look on her face, I know I've gotten myself into a trap I don't want ot be in.