44 | without his heart

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V A U G H N

"You shouldn't have done that, idiot," Thea scowls over the phone. "You made me look even worse than before to her. You know how much she hates me—"

"She doesn't hate you, Willows," I cut her off in a sharp tone. Hearing the 'she' with 'hate' in the same sentence irks me.

She hates me too now. Again.

"Yeah, and the sun rises in the west..." I can practically see her rolling her eyes as she speaks. "When will you stop sacrificing your happiness for no reason? The important thing is that she said she will accept my son. Wasn't that enough for you?"

"I did what I had to do, Thea. She wasn't safe with me. I can't put her in danger anymore just because she's married to me."

"Vaughn, this isn't healthy," the annoying lady over the phone argues. "You need her. She needs you. You two are meant for each other."

"Forget it," I grunt, playing with a button of my suit as I recline in my chair. "Tell me about him. How's he doing?"

"The painkillers are making him sleep all the time," she sighs. "His hand seems to be returning to senses though...but the doctor said he can't go to school and he's worried about that."

"Tell him I'll take care of school. He knows how much I love him."

"Yeah, he knows that..."

Her voice drops to a low tone and I can hear the familiar hurt in it along with the hesitation in her breathing. I have gotten so used to Thea Willows bringing herself down that I have a special sixth sense when it comes to her feelings. Her heart is covered by a layer of emotionless void but the inside is full of unsung feelings.

"Hey, mind tell me what's troubling you?"

"It's you, Vaughn," she answers quickly, knowing that ignoring my question won't affect my stance. "I can't see you like this. You know how much I care for you. You've been with me through thick and thin...I...I feel like I have taken too much of you. I feel guilty..."

"Willows...shut up, okay? Just stop talking..." I tell her, my voice gentle but my words strong. "I didn't do anything for you. You were always on your feet. You're an amazing woman, Willows, and I wouldn't want any more than that. You gave me him."

"But it doesn't mean that you can't have a family of your own."

"I do have a family of my own," I exhale with a sigh. "I have my mom and Rose."

"You know that's not what I meant," Thea mumbles. "Anyways, I don't bother arguing with you nowadays. Just keep me updated on your stupid decisions. Luv ya, bye!"

"Bye."

I cut the call and throw the phone on the desk with a thud. I lean on the desk, rubbing my eyes with the heels of my hands. The ache in my head builds up. It has been there since the time Claire left. I haven't been able to sleep or eat properly. Every time I look at my phone, I keep fighting the urge to call her. Just to hear her voice.

But I can't call her. Calling her would show her that I care and being cared for by me would put her in danger. I need her to be safe more than I need to live.

"Boss?"

I lift my head to see Jake Gallagher standing by the door. He is in his usual costume except opting for a grey shade of outfit this time. He has some files in his hands and raises his hand to show them to me.

"Come in." I lean back in the chair and loosen my tie as Jake walks in.

"You asked me to sort these out. I just got it done." He places the files on the desk and withdraws his hand unsteadily.

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