Confusion

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      I looked out over the party, at all the smiling faces. I watched how the people of the pack interacted with each other. I watched how Roman and Kare interacted with them, and how they were with each other.  I smiled, it was a bit forced. I loved this life for Kare, but I couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't my home. Like this isn't where I was supposed to be. 

 I had kept having the same dream; a dream about a place I didn't even know existed. After the entire fiasco with Lucina, I've been wondering if majority of the things I remember, or dream are real. 

"Two drinks!" my head snapped in the direction of Blake as he came back to the table we sat at with two very pink drinks in hand. I felt my ears lift in anticipation. I loved when he was near me. It just felt right.

I dearly needed alcohol. It had been too long. 

"Gimme! Gimme!" I sang like a child. He laughed before offering one to my hand. I took and took a sip instantly smiling. "It's disgusting." I said bluntly before taking another sip. "That's how you know it's gonna work." I winked. 

He growled lowly at my gesture. I locked eyes with his and they seemed darker, almost like onyx. I bit my lip. 

"I like when you growl at me." I said honestly. I watched as he sat down, never breaking eye contact with me. He was watching me as I watching him. Studying. I smirked under his stare. This, I could get used to. 

"Oh, do you?" he smirked. I laughed but nodded nonetheless, keeping the laugh short. 

"I love it." I said lowly. We had this deep sexual tension building, and I wanted to let it. I was...a bit scared to share myself with Blake. I wasn't a virgin. I had already had a "first love" experience, but I had nothing like this. I sighed thinking of Theo. We had once shared a great love. I thought back on my days at home before he left to go to boarding school. I was always clinging to Kare, calling her almost every night wondering how I would ever get over the heart break. I became bitter, expecting the love that was meant for others. Hating the others who accepted the love I wished and longed for. I became bitter

"I want to know more about you." he spoke suddenly. "I want to know everything." he cocked his head to the right side, exposing his dimple as he smiled. "I want to learn you like the back of my hand."

"You make it hard not to smile all the time." I said honestly as I fought back a grin. 

"That's the point, Cali," he moved his seat closer to mine and grabbed my thigh in his hand. "I want to make you smile, all day every day until my last day. You are mine." his grip tightened as he swore to me. 

"I am yours." I said grabbing his hand.  I leaned closer to his face and planted a light kiss on his lips. "I will forever be yours." 

A loud ring interrupted our moment as we both looked up to see Roman and Kare with their hands united. "Thank you all for coming out tonight to celebrate our win against the violent witch Lucina." I looked around as everyone began to clap. I looked away as they began to look at me as the claps started to cease. They were remembering, and so I was I. I was smaller in that moment. 

"In their defeat, we were able to bring back my mom, and my sister." she gestured her hands to myself and Rave. 

"I would like to personally welcome my sister to the pack, if she accepts." I smiled and turned to Blake. His face was stuck on Kare's as if he knew something I didn't. I nodded, walking toward the alter they stood upon. I didn't even know I could be in a pack and not be a wolf. I was so new to this all. I decided not to pick apart the cheers of the pack, deciding which were sincere or not was not my job tonight. My job tonight was to give in to the feeling of fun, and let my hair down. Tonight, I was free. 

They took out a sword, a blade rather, sticking me in my finger. I winced in pain; I watched as Roman and Kare did the same. Kare pricked both fingers, connecting Roman and I by the tips of both. One of the chief elders from the pack became chanting and suddenly I felt a wave of power fill me body, as if I wasn't walking alone anymore. Instead, I felt the blood of a thousand fighters fill my spirit. I was now a part of something that was larger than myself. I looked into the crowd that now clapped in my honor. I found those eyes, oh, my favorite brown eyes only they weren't smiling back at me. 

In fact, Blake looked away from me and walked off into the distance. 


What in the actual fuck? 



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