Mcr oneshots

Mishap (ray/gerard x reader fluff)

(So, this ones gonna be fluffy! I felt like writing a comfort fic about self harm. So here's a trigger warning for topics surrounding SH and intrusive thoughts.)⚠️

You suck, you're worthless, why don't you just grab that damn razor and end it all right now?

I stared at the regular shaving razor as I let tears fall down my cheeks, it had all been to much. People had left me, I'd lost my job, I'd made an absolute fool of myself too much.

People wouldn't notice if I was gone right? Yeah.. that's probably why I should.
Should I text people first? No.. I'd make them sad. But they don't actually care, right?

I kept staring, and picked up the razor after a bit.

Just do it. do it. Do it, coward. Nobody cares anyways.

I shakily started sliding my sleeves up my arms, looking at the mess of scabs I'd made not too long ago before this.

Okay, now the other sleeve. Do it.

I rolled the other one up as well, and stared at my forearms for a second.

Better do it quick, if the adrenaline still flows you'll probably won't even feel it before you're down.

I slid the sharp razor over my skin, pressing down as I did it.

One.. two.. three..
Okay now the other arm again.

Small drops of blood started collecting around the open wounds as I passed the razor to my other hand, and started sliding the metal over my other forearm.

One.. two.. three.. four..
Too many! Go back and even it out on the other arm.

I passed the razor back over and slid it against my other arm, making my skin bleed yet again one more time.
I looked at the mess I'd made, and soon the adrenaline died down, causing me to feel every small bit of pain.
I whimpered as my salty tears fell down on my arms, making the skin sting painfully.

You're such a bitch! You should've gone deeper so you'd black out.

Dizziness started rushing to my head, but so did the panic.
What had I just gotten myself into? What had I done to myself?! I promised people I wouldn't do this again and yet there I was, crying and bleeding onto my bathroom counter.
My hands started to shake and my sobs became louder, I quickly walked to my room to call Gerard up.
Blood dripped on my bedroom floor as I looked around for my phone, once I had it I quickly dialed gerards number and prayed he would pick up.
I sat on my bed while the phone rang a few times.

I knew I could trust Gerard with things like this, he'd had his own troubles himself and he was a bit older than me so he'd always be great help.

"Hey, is it okay if I talk to you later? Ray and I were just having dinner." I heard Gerard say from the other side of the line.

"Gee.." I inhaled sharply while clenching my fist and building up the courage and strength to tell him what just happened.

After a few seconds of silence, Gerard spoke again.
"Are you there? Y/n are you okay?"

"I-I'm so sorry.." I sniffled and stuttered as I spoke.
"I-I did it again.. I cut myself again.."

"Shit.." Gerard sighed. "Don't worry okay? I'll be over in a bit." I heard shuffling and soft muttering in the background.
"You're gonna be okay, I'll bring you back over here and you can stay the night."