There's always this silence,
When the earth shatters and you finally break that last little piece you didn't know you had to break.
When the tears won't come anymore and you can't seem to wrap your head around anything, yet you understand everything.
It's the calm of the storm.
It's deadly quiet.
When you're sitting in the parking lot of your apartment and the crushing weight sinks in that your life is this revolving door of nothingness.
When you visibly watch your words hold no meaning.
When you feel your heart run away from your body because being hurt again isn't even possible at this point; you already knew.
You have this deafening silence and this intense emptiness and this eternal dread.
No one is coming after you.
No one cares what happens to you.
The simulation will keep going with or without you so what's the point.
You sit in the cold and you don't even feel it after awhile.
You just feel the silence.
And a part of you can almost feel the quiet.
Feel what it would be like to be done. Gone. Nothing.
And after those 5 minutes.
10 minutes...
37 minutes.....
Hour........
And counting. In that silence.
You peel yourself off the sticker sheet,
Paint your smile back up.
Fix your mascara and go inside.
To the house that will never be a home.
You hold your cat and try to feel the softness of his fur or the vibration of his pur
But you're just met with this endless ache. And you decide to sleep and try again tomorrow.
But tomorrow when the silence doesn't consume you when you wake, you know it's just there around the corner chasing you down.
It will always be silent.
That's why you have to make so much noise.
I'm never quiet not because I can't be.
It's because the sound is the only thing keeping me alive.
C.G.
YOU ARE READING
No one is there
Poetrypoetry book. all the things I've written that I could never say out loud. Some topics may be difficult for some people so check for disclaimers .
