The Collection

Snoring Problem

Hannah was groggy to say the least. It couldn't have been morning already. She was stuffy too, it was hard to breathe. It felt like something was clawing at her face. Her ears popped and she could finally hear the world around her. It was not a silent night; she swore she could hear a chanting of "shut up, shut up," over and over again. She slowly opened her eyes which immediately focused on 2 much smaller green eyes right in front of her face; they seemed to glow. The clawing stopped along with the chanting, until the small figure screamed and fell from Hannah's nose to on her chest with a small 'oomphf.' At least she could breathe a little better now. She felt the footsteps across her body and brought up a hand to stop them; she gently squeezed the perpetrator. Sitting up and bringing the strange little thing up to her face, she realized it was a tiny tiny woman. She had bright green eyes, darker skin, and seemed frozen in time almost completely; her legs dangling down through the fist around her. Hannah brought up her other hand and gently tapped her knuckle on the tiny woman's head.
"Anyone home?" She pretended to listen for a reply from inside the little skull. The little woman's face turned to a pout, she looked offended by the playful gesture. They stared at each other for a while until Hannah spoke again, "I thought it was funny." There was no justification to it, just a plain statement.
"Hannah, you've been snoring loud enough to rattle windows." The tiny woman spoke! Hannah was taken aback by it so much that she pushed her arm out more to distance herself from the grumpy little beast. 
"I don't snore," Hannah retorted, but she would never know.
"You realize you could kill me in an instant right?" Hannah nodded at the strange question, and the woman continued. "I climbed onto your face to stop your snoring. That's how loud you snore. I think about how easily you could kill me every day, and I climbed onto your face." Hannah was stunned, and slightly offended. It was good to know that she was snoring at the very least.
"Was it just tonight or is this every night?" She whispered it like it was information that could get someone thrown in the dungeon.
"The entire past week." Hannah had been sick the whole time but she had no idea it was affecting others. How long had others been in her house? She adjusted her grasp so that the woman was being dangled by the back of her shirt. Hannah then lifted the woman much closer to her face for inspection, the woman spun slightly but seemed rather unamused now. The woman spoke first anyway.
"I get it, I'm small, you didn't know I lived here, you're sick, it's late, and we're all tired. But please do something about your sleep-screaming or I'm gonna go feed myself to a dog." Hannah assumed that meant to quell her snoring. 
"Do you have a name, little dude?" 
"It's not little dude; it's Birch." Hannah blinked and needed a double take to comprehend the name.
"Like the tree?" Hannah's voice rose as she asked the question.
"Like the tree." Birch did little jazz hands as she said it, but they were very unenthusiastic. 
"What the hell…"
"I didn't think it was that bad of a name." Birch looked hurt by Hannah's words.
"No, I'm sorry, it's just a lot to take in… Birch," Birch shrugged. "Do you want to sleep in my bed? I guess it's the least I can do. I'll sleep on my side, I hear that can help a lot with snores."
"Please put me down first." Hannah set her down feet first on top of her blanket-covered lap.
"I like your eyes, luminescent." Hannah knew she had to tell her, she genuinely did think they were cool eyes. Birch looked away and seemed a little flustered but it was hard to tell.
Hannah scooped Birch up in her palm and rolled over, placing a pillow between her knees. She cupped Birch right by her cheek and used her other hand to cover them up with the blanket down by her waist. Birch was shaking a little but maybe she was excited and it was like a happy shaking. Either way, Hannah was exhausted and fell asleep just as easily. She would know if she was snoring if she was woken up again, by little fists hitting her softy.