My Ex-Bestfriend

The Aftermath

PRESENT DAY (Day after prom):

My body eventually gave out on me last night and I did succumb to sleep. When I woke this morning I had an eerie feeling it was all a dream. Until I flutter my eyelids and see the severed rope from the ladder in tattered remnants that still clung to my window.

I know I have been through worse. I have lost my mom literally before my eyes. What hits harder though is I have actually known Michael twice as long. He was my person and I thought I was his.

I check my phone again. Still no message and my heart breaks all over. I swallow the cry that wants to escape. So foreign to my body.

I spend the rest of today typing up the last article I would ever write for the newspaper.  Of course with my bad luck it has to be an article about Michael and his-better- than- me -newly -devirginized girlfriend. So it's not much of a distraction from my present situation. I want to push my journal code of ethics aside and discuss the superficiality of prom night but I am better than that.

I refuse to be petty and make it suck on purpose. I know that  as a future reporter I won't always get to pick my interests or beliefs.

I  survive the rest of the weekend with dad delivering neapolitan ice cream to my door and pizza. I refuse to eat the strawberry portion instead I hurl it at Michael's house outside the window.

This small glimmer of hope stayed lodged in my chest as I anticipated all weekend for Michael to knock on our door. Not that he had knocked on our door the entire time I lived here. He had always climbed up the rope, bypassing my dad in his recliner.

I knew Michael could see what I had done. The rope ladder was always visible from his bedroom. He would see it cut and what it meant. Yet my heart kept waiting for him to pound on our front door begging, pleading for a second chance. I am not prepared to forgive him but I still want the option. I check my cell for the 100th time today and still no messages either. No knock and no text. That tiny sliver of my heart closing up and a wall is being fortified and built around it.

This week is the last week of school. It is finals for most unless you have grades like mine and they allow you to opt out. I just need to submit the paper for final approval to Mrs. Levi before I head out those double doors for the last time.

Like every time before Mrs. Levi approves my paper and with an awkward hug we say our goodbyes. She was a great teacher and journalistic inspiration and I can't  wait until I get to college to further my portfolio. This has been the only bright spot in the past few days.

The absolute last thing I need or want to do is empty my locker. Unfortunately it is right near Colleen's. I scan the hallway and since it is still early before school has started there aren't many people traipsing about. I beeline it to my locker as I start chucking everything into my bag. No time or cares to relish in this monumental life passage.

I heard the familiar clinking behind me of her damn high heels. It always grated my nerves but today in particular my patience is wearing thin. We had to wear a school uniform but footwear had no restrictions. Colleen wore high heeled shoes every freaking day. I think I would have a heart attack if I saw her in tennis shoes.

Her basic friends in tow as well. Of course they were, why wouldn't they be? I sigh as I pick up my pace grabbing armfuls of things shoving them in my bag as trash falls to the ground cursing myself for being so disheveled.

"You guys sorry I couldn't text. It was the most magical weekend ever." Colleen flutters her eyelashes exuberantly. I clench my jaw so hard my teeth might break under the pressure.

Just great. Now I get to hear Colleen gushing to her friends.

"He was so sweet, kind and respectful."

Her friends coon in unison, "Awe! Y'all are a story book romance!"

I hold in a scoff. If she only knew her story book romance wasn't all a lie. At least on his end.

"Was it good??? Did it hurt??" The Basic crew asks.

"I can't kiss and tell but I will say I haven't stopped smiling since."

The basic friends sigh and smile. I feel acid in my stomach defying gravity. Everything that I would ever care to keep was in my bag and I tossed it over my shoulder slamming the locker closed.

I didn't realize I took my anger out the locker, the slam causing Colleen and her entire crew to jump.

"Geesh, someone needs to get laid." I didn't need to hear who said that, I knew it was Colleen. Apparently one time and now she is a novice.

I turned around regardless but my mouth freezes. I see Michael now hovering behind Colleen mouth ajar.

Would it matter if I just confessed everything then in there? Broke Colleen's perfect little fantasy world. It wouldn't matter though because no one would believe it. I would be the delusional "lesbo" just looking for attention.

I turn back around and head for the doors. Did Michael follow me out and come confess his undying love and forgiveness? No. That coward didn't move an inch from Colleen's side.

That was the final straw. I made up my mind. I wasn't gonna spend my summer next door to my now nemesis.

I know  it will take some convincing but I have a plan to get back the control I had over my life. To restore my sanity.

My dad wasn't  too sentimental even though I am his only child and he understood I needed to get away. I didn't have to go into details of what transpired between Michael and I but it was as if my dad knew.

I had already planned for early admittance to college but I didn't want to wait until after graduation. I want to head out now. I don't want to spend one more minute at a school activity with Colleen and Michael. I can just get my diploma in the mail. There is summer freshmen orientation and the dorms are already open. My dad agreed and we packed up the few belongings I would need with me for the dorm today. While everyone else finished their exams I headed out.

Dad gave me another long embrace. I think it is a record, two hugs in the same week. As I pull away from the place that held treasured memories I knew in my heart I am never coming back. I do one last thing. I pull out my phone and I block Michael.

I don't care what excuse he has or why he did what he did. I never want to waste another word on someone who doesn't care about me.