Beyond The Fangs

Chapter 32

JAEGER

I was hoping she would faint from the sight of my wound. I was hoping she would cover my hand with the blanket and feign ignorance. I was hoping she'd do anything other than try and aid me herself. But she didn't. Despite her constant gagging, she'd cleaned and wrapped my wound.

Anytime I got an injury, I always tended to myself, but not this time. It was weird having someone look after me, especially since that someone was Izzy.

She exhaled once she was done and despite having my eyes closed, trying to feign sleep, I could feel her gaze on my skin. I slowly opened my eyes and she looked me dead in the eye. 

"You might not be able to tell, but I am so confused out of my mind right now." I could tell. "What the hell happened?" She was dead serious, her voice going a few octaves lower. 

"I cut myself on purpose," I lied.

She stared blankly at me, clearly not believing a word. "I'm not stupid Jaeger, you'd never do that."

"Why not?"

"Because I know you."

"You do not know me."

"Clearly not!" She screamed, and an expression like hurt crossed her features. "Explain. What in the world is going on? This is the scar the Quearus gave you when you grabbed the dagger, isn't it? Why is it infected? Why hasn't it healed yet?" She asked the questions in quick succession. Why did you hide it from me, Jaeger?!"

I hadn't told anyone about this, the fact that I was an Impurity, because I knew how everyone would react. They'd shun me, but I was used to being shunned so I could bear it. They'd leave, but I was used to being alone so I could go back to that. I was used to it all, but I didn't want to go back to it, to having the shadows as my only companion. 

"It doesn't matter."

"It does matter!" She shouted, surprising me. "Don't you get it? Jaeger, your wound was infected. You could have died if you'd waited longer. Why didn't you treat it as soon as we got to the village? Why did you hide it from me and lie to me!"

Her tone, her words... why did it sound like she actually cared?

"Why haven't you healed? Jaeger, what is going on?" She demanded

Could I trust that Izzy wasn't like everyone else? That she wouldn't leave and give up on our task at hand because of what I was?

I sighed but said, "I'm not who you think I am."

"You clearly aren't. You aren't telling me something and I swear if you don't tell me, I'll force it out of you."

"Force it out of me?"

"I swear I will," she threatened.

"No you won't," I said.

She let out a cold, humourless laugh, "What makes you so sure?"

"Because I know you."

Inwardly seething, she said, "you're pissing me off." When I didn't answer, she took a deep breath, rage on the verge of gripping her.

"Stop doing that Izzy."

"Doing what!"

"Stop acting like you care."

"And what if I do care!"

"You don't, and that's what pisses me off!" I shouted, mostly at myself than at her. "You don't care, so why do I? You don't think of me so why am I constantly thinking of you?" 

I was talking to myself at this point, reviling myself. "I hate how much I suddenly care about you. I hate that I want to be close to you all the time!" 

I stood from the couch and stepped back a pace from her. "I hate the constricting I feel in my chest whenever you smile and the fact that I have to force myself not to look at your lips. I hate that I could do anything for you at this point! And I especially hate the fact that you don't feel what I feel." 

I was panting at this point, but she just looked at me. Just... looked. She opened her mouth to speak but no words came out.

"I'm not who you think I am," I continued, softer this time. "And once you know, I doubt you'll want to work with me anymore. I doubt you'll even want to remain in my presence."

She swallowed but stood and faced me, her nut-brown eyes burning with an emotion I couldn't place. "Try me."

"I don't heal Izzy," I said after a short pause, "What else could that mean?" I was actually doing this, telling her. "I don't drink blood either, so what could that mean?" Her brows creased in confusion but she remained silent. Listening. "I can only do so many things that vampires can, so what does that mean?" Looking at me, I could tell she was trying to figure out what my words truly meant. I paused for several seconds and deeply inhaled before saying, "I'm not a vampire, Izzy."

After a long pause, she said, "that makes no sense. If you're not a vampire then... then what are you? Human?"

"My mother was."

"Your mother?" Her confusion slowly faded into something grave. "You're an impurity?"

"Yes. I am."