Bloodthirsty Secrets

chapter four | strange becomings, stranger explainations

Another week passed, and Dean continued to visit the nest. Sam didn't seem any more suspicious than he had been. Everything seemed to be going well.

Until his brother cornered him in the kitchen, and started questioning him.

"Where's Cas?" Sam asked. He was holding his hands behind his back and Dean couldn't tell why. "And why have you two been going out so much in the middle of the night recently?"

Cas wasn't there; he was probably spending time with the nest because he'd joined in on that too. He thought about praying, but decided he should probably sort this out on his own.

"Well..." He came up with a lie Sam would really enjoy on the spot. "We're seeing each other."

"Oh," Sam said, eyebrows raised.

"Yeah..." Dean trailed off, loosing his focus for just a fraction of a second.

Then, Sam whipped his arm around, and Dean felt a poke in his shoulder.

"Dead man's blood," Sam whispered into Dean's ear. "Like I would believe your silly little story for a second. You're too stupid to realize what you and Cas have is special, and apparently also too stupid to clean up after yourself."

"I didn't-- I..." Dean trailed off, as he blacked out and fell to the ground.

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When Dean woke up, he was tied to the chair in the room with the devil's trap. Sam was frantically pacing back and forth in front of him, and he knew he needed to do something quick before anything worse happened.

He decided to go with how he was turned. "Remember that case we worked with the vamps who kidnapped and turned a child so they could have a family?"

"Yeah," Sam said calmly, and stopped his pacing.

"Well, remember that one you killed in that burning room, right in front of me?"

"Yeah?"

"Before you came in, he forced me into drinking his blood," Dean said.

"How come you never told me this?" Sam spoke slowly.

Dean hesitated. "Because I thought you might blame yourself, for not giving me the chance to get his blood for the cure."

"Wait." Sam shook his head, probably trying to sort out his thoughts. "There were no signs, though. No blood on your mouth, or anything."

"He had it in a vile," Dean explained. "They were trying to turn a child, remember? They didn't want the process to be violent and gory."

Sam sighed, and ran his hands over his face. "And now you're a monster, because of what I did. I thought I was saving you, but I was doing exactly the opposite."

"Well, I think that's a little rude--"

Sam slammed his hands down over Dean's chained up wrists. "Don't deny it, Dean. That's what you are! That's all you ever will be now. And it's all my fault."

"Well, technically it's the dude who turned me's fault," Dean said. Sam removed his grip and shook his head. Dean decided he should probably add, "If it makes you feel any better, I don't really care about what I am anymore. It doesn't really affect who I am, if that makes sense." Then, he smiled and said, "Ah, good ol' Rain, and all their wisdom."

"What? Who the hell is Rain?"

"They're in my nest." It was the first time he'd said that. He wasn't even sure it was completely true, but he decided to go with it. "Anyway, enough about them. Why am I tied up?"

"Because I found an old man with his throat ripped out, and when I followed the trail of evidence, it all led to you," Sam said.

"That wasn't me! I'd never do something like that," Dean pleaded. "C'mon, Sammy you know that, right?"

"Then who was it, Dean?" Sam questioned. "Because from what I know, you and your nest are the only vampires in the area."

"I don't know-- maybe it was Sandy... Well, no, it couldn't have been. He's trying too hard for Rain to screw up like that. And it sure as hell couldn't have been Rain," Dean said, then added, "They were vegan before they turned. They literally mix the blood they drink with wine because it grosses them out so much."

"That doesn't matter, Dean."

"What, so you're just gonna kill me, then? Or worse, continue to hunt me down? I haven't done anything wrong! I've only ever drank from blood bags," Dean said.

Sam sighed, and rubbed his temple. "I'm not going to kill you, but you can't stay here. Not like this."

"Why not?"

"Dean, you kept this from me for how long? And you expect me to trust you?"

"Sam, you know I'd never--"

"Don't fight me on this. Just-- just go," Sam said quietly. He hesitantly undid the rope restraining Dean to the chair. "Before I change my mind."

"Just so you know," Dean said, before he left. "One of the people in my nest is a hunter -- not a vampire, just a hunter. I'll tell her about what you said. With her help, I'm sure we can find who actually killed that man."

And with that, he left Sam and went to the home of his nest. He'd never admit it to anyone, but later that night, in private, he sobbed to Rain. He asked them how the world could be so cruel. They said that's just how it is, that bad things happen to the best people.

And somehow, Dean knew that Cas was listening in, and a part of him was grateful that he cared so much. But another part of him, one that was far closer to the surface, was afraid. Afraid of what could become of him and Cas if what Sam said was true.

To that, he cried harder. Until a sweet little voice from the deepest depths of his mind came splashing to the top, breaking through and telling him that it's okay.

He wondered for a second if it had actually been Cas telling him that. But, that thought was brushed aside whenever the door opened and Cas was standing there. He motioned for Rain to leave, and replaced their arms with his own, embracing Dean.

"Sam still loves you," Cas said into Dean's neck. "And I still love you."

That alone made Dean's wretched thoughts stop altogether. He let out a shaky sigh, and gripped Cas tightly.

"Save me, Cas," Dean whispered. "Save me from this hell I'm in."

"Dean..."

All the joking -- that's what he thought it was, just his brother having a kick at him. But maybe he had been right all along. Maybe him and Cas were perfect. No, not perfect...but just right enough for each other. Their relationship was special -- but that just wasn't something Dean was ready to admit out loud yet.

Especially not when all he could smell was Cas' blood. It hit the back of his throat and choked him like a wrongly swallowed piece of food.

Dean's fangs slide out with ease. He could do it now -- just a little. That's all he needed.

Against his better judgement, he bit down lightly at Cas' throat, but not enough to break the skin. Cas sat up straighter, probably preparing to fly away if things went too far.

A snarl grew from the back of Dean's throat. In a moment, they were on the floor, Dean pinning Cas down. He felt his breath grow heavy, as Cas stared up at him with absolutely no fear in his eyes. There was only...

What even was the look Cas was giving him?

"Dean..."

At that, he lost control and bit down again. Instead of making some inhuman noise like he had before, Dean moaned against Cas' neck.

That's when he knew it'd gone too far. He'd crossed a line he wasn't ready to cross, and it frightened him so much that his fangs immediately retracted and he left the room without another word.