Unworthy

CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

Kathy's POV

I feel fingers running through my curls as a voice hums a familiar song, a song that my mother sang to me when I was young whenever I was sad or hurt. Her voice is soothing and beautiful, angelic even, I try to sing to the melody but something clogs my airway, I thrash trying to remove what's choking me, I lift up my hand to remove it but a hand grabs my wrist stopping my movements.
"Kathy! nurse!nurse! Honey calm down, you are okay, you are okay" she says stroking my forehead. I peel my eyelids open, blinking several times to adjust to the light. A woman wearing a white dress, apron and cap barges in followed by a man wearing a Lab coat. Dr Williams.

"How are you feeling Luna?" Dr Williams asks once the breathing tube is removed.
"Sore" I say with a groggy voice, he nods his head.
"I expected as much, what is the last thing you remember?" he asks.
"I remember - we were attacked by Rogues, the bunker - me changing into my Wolf to help Lea, oh my goddess! is she okay?" I try to sit up, groaning in the process.
"Luna, it's too soon, don't strain yourself" Dr Williams says gently pushing me back to lay on the bed.
"Lea is fine". Mum answers.
"What about my son? Michael? Where are they, are they okay?"
"They are fine honey"
"The Alpha has been informed that you are awake and he is on his way". Dr Williams says "and Vincent is at school" Mum adds. School?
"What day is it?"
"Friday, you have been in a coma for five days" she says. Wow. Five days. The door swings open and Michael walks in. My heart breaks at the sight of him, he looks disheveled, his hair looks like a hand has passed through one too many times sticking in all directions and he has bags under his eyes. He has not been sleeping or taking care of himself and its all my fault. I broke his promise but I couldn't let Lea die. I had to help. I promise I will make it up to him.
"Hey"
"Hey beautiful" he says placing a kiss on my cheek with a forced smile on his face. His mad at me and I understand why. Well, I better start with my apologies.

"I am so sorry Michael I know I promised not to leave the pack house but I had to help, the rogues were going to kill Lea - I couldn't let her die but in the process I got hurt which in turn hurt you - I am so sorry I didn't listen to you". I place my hand in his. "I am so sorry and thank you for saving me" I am beginning to realize that it may not have been a wise decision to join the fight, I could have died. Thank the goddess for giving me a second chance. "I promise I will make it up to you" his body goes stiff as he removes his hand from mine, looking away. "Michael?" he backs away from me
"I need to go back to the office, I have a lot of paperwork" he says walking away, I am taken aback by his actions.
"What! I just woke up from a coma and all you can think about is work, are you that mad at me?" he stops a few inches from the door, I am facing his back, he won't turn to look at me, I stare at my mother hoping she will help me understand what's happening to my mate but she looks to be on the verge of crying.
"Alpha, I think it's best we tell her now, she will find out sooner or later" Dr Williams says
"Tell me what? Michael?" he still won't look me in the eye.
"Luna"I turn my attention to Dr Williams "Luna, did you know you were pregnant?" My eyes widen as my hand goes to my stomach. Wait. Were, past tense. I shake my head, as tears begin to stream down my face. "I am so sorry Luna, you were five weeks pregnant" I continue to shake my head, my body trembles gripping the sheets "due to the impact of the injuries you had suffered, you lost the baby and we had to perform an emergency hysterectomy. "No,no, no, no, no" I sob gasping for air as my mum places her arms around my neck as she cries with me. My body pains long forgotten.

"This - is all - my - fault" Michael wraps his arms around me whispering words in my ear but I can't hear him as I drown in guilt. His shirt now has a large wet stain from my tears and snot.
My body heaves, I have no strength left in me. What have I done?
I wail for the baby whose eyes I will never see , the baby I will never be able to have again and the pain I have caused my mate, curling up into myself. This is all my fault.