The Knight in Leather Armor

ch.27 One way or another

I felt everything break, crack, screech into a thousand pieces. 

And he saw. He saw the fear and complete shattering of my strength. Whatever strength I had to have been able to hide and suppress and forget everything from that night- had dissolved.

I pulled my hand away- not too fast that Becky would be suspicious, but enough to show I wasn’t going to let him win. I wasn’t going to let him win.

He cocked his already arched brow, making me doubt my already wavering self-esteem.

Birthday boy and his friends all exchanged hungry, eager glares. All their bruises and broken bones had healed, but the scars remained. The scars of revenge remained. 

I recoiled as they took a step closer.  I looked to Becky, for support, for understanding, but she gave me none. How could she? She doesn’t know.

“Come on, Angie, Lou and his friends are taking us to the mall” she smiled. Noticing my hesitation, Becky took my arm and led me to the car.

“Becky, I have to-” I tried to excuse myself, completely unwilling to be dragged to my death.

Becky gave me a hard look. She was acting so weird, like she was trying to impress someone.

Birthday boy narrowed his blue-black eyes at me, burning a poisonous hole into my chest.

“Now, Angela, this won’t take long” he winked, purposefully using the same words from that night.

My chest tightened as I tried to control my on-coming asthma attack.

Birthday boy reached his arm out to take mine, but I scooted back- close to Becky.

Becky gave me a stern look and half-forced me into the car. I knew if I struggled too much, they would only hurt more and faster. I just wished Becky knew so she could escape.

I swallowed hard and sat in the backseat, as far away from the other three guys- as possible. Birthday boy looked at me from the car mirror and winked.

The stout, dark-haired one leaned his arm around my shoulder. I shrugged him off, but then his friend, the tall gangly one, pulled me to his cold chest and stroked my hair slowly enough to be excruciatingly painful.

I wrapped my arms around myself as I looked between them. There was no escape.

“Don’t worry, sweetie, we’re not gonna hurt ya” the dark-haired one grinned. The other one laughed slightly.

Becky turned around and smiled at us, like we were telling old jokes.

I just sat there, hoping they’d kill me quickly. Hoping, it wouldn’t be too painful and that they’d bury me where my father was murdered, in the meadow.

But they didn’t do anything. They just sat there- sat very close to me- with their cigarette and tobasco sauce stench. They touched my cheek, my neck, my hair- carefully, with their cold fingers, like they were admiring a doll they were about to break. But they were waiting, waiting for their ring leader to signal them “ok” before they attacked.

Birthday boy pulled up to the mall. It was the mall on the corner of 21st and H. They had planned this. They had planned it so horrifically and symbolically well- it made me sick.

Becky grabbed my arm and pulled me to the dress section of Forever 21. She began rummaging through dresses with great interest and seriousness. If only she gave that attention to school or, at least her best friend who was quietly dying inside.

I had to tell her. I had to warn her. What if they wanted to hurt her, too? What if they’ve already hurt her and she just couldn’t say anything, just like I can’t say anything right now?