Educational Experience

Part III--Chapter 4

This is a VERY long chapter, but I think you'll have fun shopping with Colt and the ladies-it's a Pretty Woman moment that Wyatt will never forget. And there's a new character along for the fun who'll give you a few giggles, too. Let's shop 'til we drop!

So, have you always wondered what those big celebrity parties are really like?

Sorry. My parties are nothing like that. Because if I invited you, you're probably not into the celebrity game. You leave your "yes men" at the crib and come out dressed 'way down. I mean wearing stuff that would make your "stylist" commit hara kiri, probably.

But it did have that "MTV Music Awards" sort of vibe at first, I admit. Wyatt hung on extra tight when we got out of the elevator, because we had to fight our way through the crowds of tourists who'd been let in to shop and got all hot and bothered that we were actually in the house.

And there were a few celebs I didn't actually know personally hanging around trying to get a few prime photo ops. That's okay, though. Like I said, it's part of the game. I'm not mad at 'em. You fight your way into the spotlight, you need to make the most of the little time it shines on you.

Speaking of which, right when we were really in the thick of it, I lunged out and grabbed this rapper dude named J Weezee we'd known back home and got him behind the security wedge. And he starts doing that "I'm not worthy" bow and going, "Playa, playa, playa! Break me off just one, man!"

"I'm tryin'a save your life and you're thinkin' about tail," I said.

"Aw, come on, pimpin! You don't need all of 'em! I mean, there's only so much even you can do at one time, young blood!"

I have to admit, I was surrounded by some serious hotness. Not just the girls, but Celie, Amelie, Wyatt, Che, "an embarrassment of bitches," is how some guy wrote it one time. I wasn't happy about the "bitches" thing, but it was funny enough that the girls didn't mind so much.

I said, "You didn't come over here alone either, son. Don't even try to front."

He laughed and said, "Bitches out spennin' my money jus' like these ones here gon' spen' yours. Only you done messed up the game forever, playa. Anything you buy a bitch, she gon' gi' you that attitude, talkin' 'bout, 'Where my casino at?'"

That got a big laugh from everybody including all the big guards. But I said, "Tell 'em they want one like theirs, they'll have to pay for it like they did, too."

"You tryin'a get a brutha killed," he said.

And then Aisha came up and got hold of his arm and said, "Bitches been tryin'a kill you long befo' this!"

That got a good laugh, too. Even before she reached over and rubbed his almost bald head. The girls knew him from his former life, when he was the worst pimp in the history of pimps. He started real young, but that's not why.

His girls just used to run all over his silly ass. He liked tough girls, hood girls. Girls who didn't take no mess. And that meant they wouldn't listen to him, either. Because Weezee loved women. You can't love women and be a good pimp. Not really love them, I mean.

You can be a connoisseur, you know? You can be into them like some people like fine wine or good cigars, maybe, but even that's dangerous for a pimp. Cause you can't say or do the things a good one does if you're that far into it.

His girls, the ones that had been in the game before, they were always taking a lil sum off the top before they handed over their earnings. A few of 'em did some work on the side without him knowing it. Everybody else knew, of course.