Once You Were My Friend

September 2021, Stranger

The dining room was dimly lit and the scent of warm dinner filled the room made by Tamo. It was the pre-celebratory dinner before the actual party, that was for Saturday. Nami was relieved when Em assured her it was going to be an intimate dinner. There were lots of different fried tempura and a pot of noodle soup. Muffled music played on the record player and it made the room feel fuller than what it actually was. Nami excused herself from the room and made her way to the bathroom, stopping by the bookshelf. What kinds of books filled a person's shelf told a lot about themselves, she thought. Surprised to see a Murakami book, she took it off the shelf and flicked through it, feeling the cool wall against her back.

Barely a minute later, she was joined by Sebastian. "Hey," he said quietly as he leaned his shoulder against the bookshelf. Nami looked up briefly to acknowledge him, "hey yourself." A very obvious silence was building and Nami could feel the awkwardness in her bones, unsure how to speak with him after all these years. Knowing that they weren't really strangers, yet they were, at least to Nami.

"I always found it quite amusing that Tamo is an avid Twilight fan," he said. When she looked up from the pages, Sebastian held open New Moon with a smug look. His eyes were lingering a little too long for her liking.

"Who knew he could read?" Nami teased and went back to flicking through Norwegian Wood.

"Have you read that yet?" He gestured with his chin.

"I have it on my shelf. I just haven't gotten time to read it." She found herself gripping onto the book a little too tight, wishing she'd knew how to handle things like simple communication.

"Can I ask you something?" His voice was calm and then he put away New Moon back on the shelf.

"Sure," she said, briefly looking at him and back onto the pages.

"Are you avoiding me?" He asked as he tilted his head.

"No." She said quickly, all the while her stomach had been in knots since she saw him, more so even now.

"You're practically hiding in that book from me."

She heaved a sigh, "and why would I be doing that?" She continued to read words on a page to distract herself as if he'd leave her alone if she didn't look at him. "I'm simply reading a book and you happen to walk into my space," she said. Those same flutters in her chest she felt when they were kids came back, scarily comforting because he still felt like home despite being strangers now.

"I don't know, Nami." He said, quite entertained in the way this was going, wanting to get some sort of reaction out of her. "I wanted to read a book and you happen to be here."

"Very funny," she said unamused but fought the urge to laugh a little. His smile widened a slight, watching her face restrain from smiling. He was still silly and she hated the way it made her feel as if to erase his betrayal from memory. She folded the book and he was quick to take it off her hands before she could put it away, exacerbating those same flutters rising to her chest.

"Let's see," he said as he flicked through the pages. Her hands felt safe behind her back as she grounded herself by putting them flat against the crimson wall, cooling her palms compared to the heat in her cheeks.

Nami watched him and thought about how strange all this was though not very strange at all. He had a more grown up look about him, less boyish and more rugged. He had taken off his corduroy jacket then, and his crochet sweater made him look more sophisticated than he actually was. His eyes were still her favourite shade of blue even after all this time. And when he spoke, flecks of his accent could still be heard if listened carefully.

"So, what are you doing now? Still writing, I hope." He asked, briefly taking his eyes off the page to look at her. She immediately looked away before focusing back onto the bookshelf. "No, actually. I'm in graphic design."