If You'd Let Me

Chapter 6

I had been awake for a few minutes, when she roused from her sleep. Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled, when she realised I was awake too.

"Hi."

"Hi," I mumbled back.

She snuggled into my chest. "You know, you're really comfortable to sleep with."

I made a disgusted face.

"Ewh no, not that way," she exclaimed, chuckling. "Now I can't get that thought out of my head. Ewh."

I chuckled. We were close, but in a platonic friendship way.

"You know what I meant. You're like a big teddy bear," she smiled.

"Glad to have been of service then."

She laughed and got up, "Alright, I was thinking —"

"—Oh no, not the thinking!" I gasped dramatically.

"Oh shut up," she hit me playfully.

I rubbed my shoulder, pouting.

"Oh c'mon you big baby. People'd think you could take a punch. You literally kill for a living."

"And I freelance," I added.

She laughed again, "I almost forgot. You freelance too. Good for you."

I pouted, making her laugh. She ruffled my hair. I swatted her hand away in annoyance.

"Anyways, how about you go take a shower and I'll make us some breakfast," she raised a brow in question.

"Yeah, sounds good to me."

I showered, brushed my teeth, did my hair and got dressed. I felt better than I felt in days. A shower always helped a little. Didn't mean I wasn't still drowning, but at least I was drowning with clean clothes on.

I walked out the room and saw the team sitting in the kitchen. Flan greeted me enthusiastically, while the team looked a little uncomfortable. The didn't know how to react. I hated the tiptoeing. They meant well, but it was annoying.

I rolled my eyes, mumbling, "Hey." I sat down on one of the chairs at the bar.

Flanna put a plate of food in front of me, "Bon appetit."

I smiled at her, "Thanks Flan."

She served a plate for herself and we both dug in, chatting away. She told me all about her mission, which was apparently successful. Not that I had expected anything less.

Flanna and Holly had been overseas for a high-risk job. Normally we didn't work outside the country, but once in a while there were exceptions.

After breakfast I headed out. I couldn't — wouldn't — deal with them when they tiptoed around me. Flanna walked me to the door, happily chatting away. "Are you coming back tonight?"

I looked up at her, "Depends whether they're still acting like this when I get back tonight. Might not stay for long if that's the case. So I might, might not."

"I'll talk to them," she smiled.

She knew as well as I that it was important that I came. Once in a while I got like this and I shouldn't isolate myself. Isolation always worsened it, while Flanna always somehow got me out of it. Well not completely. When it wasn't that bad, she could take the edge off. But when it was worse, even she couldn't fix it.

"What are you doing today?"

I shrugged, "Might meet up with a friend I made the other day."

She beamed, "What are they like?"

"They're actually really nice."

"Sounds great, Row. I'm happy for you."

I smiled back at her. I couldn't share much more than this though. We never revealed personal information at work. I'd get messy if we did. No names, addresses, friends or any of that kinda information. We might not be able to share that kinda information, but we did know each other in other ways. We might not know the other's real name, but we knew each other's character, their likes, and dislikes and that was enough for us.

Not that they'd get far with my name. Zivon Calder had only existed for the last 7 years. Before that Zivon didn't even exist. Sure in the records he did. He went to high school, grew up in a lovely family. Zivon Calder had it all, but that was only in the records.

"It is," I answered. "I'll be on my way now. Will probably see you tonight."

She nodded and I left, going up in the crowd after I left the building.

I stopped off at home for my stuff and was on my way to the library. I walked inside and saw Liz already sitting there.

I greeted her as I sat down across from her.

She looked up, surprised, "You're here."

I chuckled, "Yes of course. Why wouldn't I be here?" Hoping she wouldn't know I wasn't here the last few days.

"You weren't here the past few days and I thought I might have scared you off."

She had noticed. Sheepishly I smiled, "I'm sorry." She had noticed. "I needed some time off and had no way of contacting you."

She sighed dramatically, holding her heart relieved. "Pweh, we should probably fix that though." She handed me her phone to put my info in.

I saved myself under Zivon Calder. I shot myself a text, so I'd have her number too. I handed the phone back and grabbed my own to save her contact info.

"What should I save you as?" I looked up, "Is Liz short for anything?"

"Elizabeth, it's short for Elizabeth. But just Liz is fine by me. You can use Rose as my last name by the way."

'I could use Rose as her last name'. It sounded like 'Rose' wasn't actually her last name. I didn't care, but why say it's your last name, when I didn't ask for a last name in the first place. Not that I could complain. That would be quite hypocritical seeing as there was literally no truth to Zivon Calder.

"What about Eliza. Eliza Rose. It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?"

She beamed, "I like it."

"Alright then it's settled, Eliza Rose." I saved her contact info.

I opened my laptop and started it up. We both went back to work, settling in a comfortable silence.

"How's your airplane coming along?" I spoke up after some time.

She stretched her arms above her head and smiled. "I found a way to get the thing off the ground. The only downside is that it crashes to the ground immediately. So that's great."

I chuckled, "I'm sure it is."

She sighed, rolling her eyes. "I swear the person that designed this is a dipshit and now my job is to clean up after their ass," she grumbled.

I was looking through my email. Luckily there was enough time to finish some projects last minute, even though I had taken three days off. "Tell me about it. Luckily I'm a freelancer. So I can decide whether to take a job or not."

"Yeah, lucky you," she pouted.

I burst out laughing at her pouting. It was adorable.

"Maybe I should consider becoming a freelancer, if you can just afford to take that much time off," she sunk down in her chair, staring up at the beautiful ceiling of the library.

I shrugged, "Maybe you should. I just looked through my ongoing projects and the nearest deadlines are still achievable. Will have to put some work in, but I'll still meet the deadline."

I followed her gaze and I, too, looked at the ceiling. It had this gothic feeling to it. The air smelling slightly of books, of wisdom. I loved it here. This was one of my safe places, which is why I did most of my freelance work here.

"I wish I could," she mumbled.

I suppressed a smile and focused on answering emails and reviewing some contracts.

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