his true self

22- double catch

"Hyunjin", you whispered.

He turned his head to you.

It was him.

What is he doing here?

How did he find me?

Will he hurt me- no- will he kill me?

Will he take me back?!

What is the about to-

"Hey", he whispered, looking straight into your eyes with an unreadable expression.

Hey?!

HEY?!

Was all he had to say after trying to kill you literally yesterday?!

Nope. Not with me, you thought as your hand came in contact with his cheek, slapping him across the face.

But there was something off... he basically allowed you to slap him- he could've caught your wrist with the blink of an eye. Yet he didn't. Why?

His had flew to the side before he turned it back to you- looking down. For some reason he seemed like he wouldn't dare to raise his head.

What kind of bad joke was this?! Finding you and then acting guilty before killing you?!

You could feel how your fear was slowly turning into anger... you were boiling inside.

"What are you doing here?", you snapped at him- keeping your voice down.

He didn't answer. No, he didn't even move an inch. Instead, he kept his head down the entire time.

"Are you going to kill me?", you asked instead.

Bingo.

His head snapped up. His eyes meeting yours.

The unreadable expression changed into a very readable one. His eyes were filled with sadness... guilt... and deep shame.

You nearly chuckled. The hell was that?!

Still, your need to chuckle was wiped away when he answered. Or well- his non-verbal answer.

Hyunjin suddenly reached his hand out for something on his back. Your breath hitched when he pulled out his gun- and it nearly stopped when he laid it in your hands.

The hell?

"Do it", he whispered.

Do what?!

"Kill me", he said, reading your mind.

"W-what?", you asked, completely out of words by his actions.

"I- I realized m-my mistake. I know what I did... j-just", his voice started to shake, "I don't deserve to live for what I did to you. I was about to kill my better half and now... I-it's only fair if you get to do it too"

W-what?!

He wants me... to kill him?!

"H-Hyunjin", you whispered, wanting to give him the gun back. You were definitely not going to kill him- although he did deserve it.

"No", he said and placed his hand over yours, stopping you. They were cold as ice but still... you could feel how it still felt right to hold his hand.

You were just not sure if you wanted to feel like that.

"I'm not going to kill you"

"But then what do you want to do? How can I ever make it up?", his voice cracked, tears forming in his eyes as he looked down, "I can't- when I found out, Y/n I- I thought I killed- I just wanted to die. I didn't trust you and I can never forgive myself for it. I- I'm sorry I should just... go and never come back, I-"

He was definitely caught up in his emotions.

Still, his words shocked you.

You could tell he was sorry.

Yet.. you of course couldn't forgive him like that.

You needed to get out of here and overthink it all. There was too much happening in your mind to think clear.

Slowly and hesitatingly reaching out your other hand, you lifted up his chin, looking straight into his tear-covered face. He looked so broken that you had the urge to hug him and tell him that you'd forgive him right here, right now.

But you couldn't.

Instead, you spoke up.

"I will think about it. I need space Hyunjin, just... give me some space, ok?"

He nodded as you stood up and placed the gun back in his hands. This time, he was not stopping you from doing so.

And then you felt like your heart couldn't take it anymore. You suddenly were on the edge of crying yourself, so you just ran out of the bar. All the way you came, into the house, straight into your room.

Hoping to finally be able to think about what just happened, you seemed to forget about one thing.

As soon as you opened the door to your room, you saw Mikyeong standing in the middle of the room. Her back facing you.

Shit.