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I HADN'T REALIZED HOW ISOLATED I WAS UNTIL I WALKED INTO THE ROOM THAT HELD MY BEST FRIEND.
My decision to not meet her until now was one that I made purely because I wasn't ready to be chewed out. I couldn't remember our last conversation. Whatever she told me, I suspected that it wasn't honeyed words.
It was dim, terribly lit all around, but most of all, it was old. The entire Clocktower was centuries old, sure, but this place was beyond that. Perhaps it wasn't well kept, maybe nobody cared enough about the people put here to add new decor. The bed must have been decades old.
Chrissy was well kept, but silent as she paced across the room, not having noticed me by her doorway yet. I was quiet, I'd been taught by Afton how to not expose yourself with loud footsteps. Chrissy was loud in this room. My hearing picked up on her frantic breath as she turned around to see me.
What was almost always a look of sweetness and understanding was cold, calculated, unlike the woman I'd known before I'd been forcibly turned into a vampire. Her dark brown eyes were furious and she didn't dare make a move towards me. A strong pit settled in my chest, my anxiety running through my veins down to my fingers that twitched with anticipation as to what she would say to me.
My former lover said nothing. Dead quiet, as if she were the statue and not me. It burned to see her upset with me in any way. We'd been together as lovers, then as friends for a period of time in my life that felt like it would be my last. Now she stood before me, looking into my newly reddened eyes, and it felt like she wasn't looking at me at all. She stared right through me.
Was I now this ugly thing to her?
Was being a vampire supposed to be an ugly thing?
The silence hurt more than any of her often poorly chosen words. The lack of transparency, my lack of memories about my turning- some parts could be explained by Chrissy. But I suspected she wouldn't share them. Between us, what had been a strong bond I thought couldn't falter, was breaking apart as I stood before her, a statue between humanity and monstrosity.
"Could you still want to be my friend when I'm a vampire?" I asked tentatively, hoping for a response that didn't include a no.
She didn't have to say yes, but it couldn't be a no.
No answer, so I asked another question to try and get something out of her.
"If the Volturi let you go, would you still be my friend?"
I stood there in stunned silence as she moved just a millimeter, just enough for me to see the terror on her face at the thought of her still being trapped. This isn't what I wanted for either of us, but this was what happened.
