Unbroken Souls (Spencer Reid x Reader POV)

Chapter 5

Hotch hands me a bulletproof vest and gives me instructions to stay back with some of the officers while they breach the house. During the ride, Garcia was able to link previous employment records and disciplinary actions to the subject and confirm this was the man responsible.

I give Reid one final glance as they enter the building. All of a sudden it feels like time stops as we wait outside, listening for what is going on inside the house. Slowly, each agent begins to yell "clear" as they search the house. There are sounds of glass pieces on the ground being kicked, rustling through items, and the opening of cabinets. The officer standing next to me keys his radio to ask for an update, and Rossi's voice replies stating they found injectable medication vials and needles scattered around the floor, alongside the mask one of the kids described to me. Relief floods my body hearing the house is clear and we are one step closer to getting the man responsible, but all of that fades instantly when I look up and see Reid slowly walking out of the house, attempting to holster his gun but failing to do so because his hands were shaking so much. His face looks pale and his eyes appear dissociated... like the Reid I knew wasn't in there anymore.

"R... Reid!" I yell out as I start moving toward him. He looks up at me and I see him starting to crumble. I run over as fast as I could, my heart pounding not knowing if he was hurt or what he'd seen. When I get to him I put his arm over my shoulder and help him to get down to the ground and sit in case he passed out. I start looking for bleeding or injuries when his shaking intensifies. He's cold to the touch and while I can see him trying to say something, he's unable to vocalize it. "Shhh, shh, it's okay, everything is okay, Spencer you're safe, are you hurt? Reid?" I sit beside him, unable to find any obvious injury as I try to take off the vest so he can breathe better. "Reid I think you're having a panic attack. Can you look at me?" I ask him, unable to hide the concern in my voice. He just moved his eyes to meet mine, and immediately I knew he was in a state of panic. "Spencer I just want you to focus on my voice okay?" I grab his hands, squeezing them to let him know I'm here. I start walking him through some deep breathing and in between coaching him through inhales and exhales, I scream out to Hotch. I can hear the team running towards us on the ground as I hold my gaze on Spencer, trying to get him to slow his breathing. Rossi is the first to arrive, looking at what he's stumbling into he just freezes.

"Rossi, what happened in there?" I ask, still holding Spencer's hand and rubbing his back with my other hand.

"I don't know, he was with us when we found the vials, he picked one up and then he kinda dropped it and walked out" Rossi replies as Prentiss and JJ come up behind him.

"What was in the vial?" I demand, in between shushes and reassuring Spencer that I'm right here and he'll be okay.

"Hotch appears with a handful of vials and asks the others to leave the area. Morgan refuses but the rest back up and watch in fear for their coworker, not knowing what's going on. Hotch bends down towards me and hands me a vial, the moment I read it, the pieces are put together with the most likely scenario and I get the others to take the vials and walk away. I look at Morgan before he turns to walk away; he nods once and leaves.

"Hey, Spencer? Focus on the sound of my voice, and try to breathe slowly with me" I demonstrate a few deep breaths and the more we breathe together, the slower his breathing becomes. After a minute or so I see him shift his head towards me, and I see his eyes start to come back to life with the knowledge and care he holds. He looks at me and my heart breaks. Something I see a lot of in this line of work is the look people get when they're terrified... and all I can do in this moment is be with him and let him know he isn't alone. His eyes start to swell with tears and he drops his head into his chest and leans his body into mine. I feel him shaking still, but not as severely as before, and I feel him working to slow his breathing. I pull him into a hug, and softly say "I've got you. Nothing's going to happen, you're going to be okay. I'm here".