Chapter 11 - Trust

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    Paintbrush sighed, carrying a bag of food in their hands with their keys in the other. They walked sluggishly to their kitchen and placed the bag down, slightly unnerved by something. They didn't know why, but they felt like they were being watched.

    They turned around and yelped in alarm as they saw Lightbulb standing with a wide grin in front of them. They gripped onto the edge of the counter and cussed, "Lightbulb! The fuck are you doing in my house?"

    "I told you! I was coming over!" She continued to smile like she hadn't done anything wrong. They took a few deep breaths and pushed their hair out of their face with a hand, "Just- don't scare me like that, okay? How did you even get my address?"

    "Like I said, I have my ways," she responded. They were so confused about how she even entered their house, let alone found out where they lived. They stared at her blankly in complete shock. "You were so adamant on coming over that you got checked out of school-"

    "Ran out," Lightbulb interrupted.

    "Ran out and- wait what? Lightbulb! What is wrong with you?" They chuckled in disbelief, "Did you just run straight out of the building and no one ran to catch you?" Lightbulb nodded eagerly, her dumb smile still plastered on her face. They weren't complaining, though. She did have a nice smile, even if she was a crazy stalker.

    "Yep! Ran out, found your address through some things I won't explain, came over, climbed the tree in your backyard, and entered through the upstairs hall window!" Paintbrush pinched the bridge of their nose, choosing not to ask about the things she didn't want to explain, "I hope you know the front door was unlocked. You could've just walked in. I forgot to lock it before I left."

    Lightbulb stared at them for a moment, dumbfounded. She waved her hand to dismiss her stupidity. "K, enough about me," she walked over and hopped on the countertop, crossing her legs professionally, "now spill. What's up with you?" She booped Paintbrush's nose with a finger. They weren't sure how to react. They never had someone ask them that before. How am I doing?

    "Me? I told you, Lightbulb, I'm fine." They responded and started walking to wash their hands. Lightbulb tsked and hopped off the counter, blocking their path, "Nuh-uh, no you're not. I can tell, so talk."

    They pushed past her and turned on the faucet, "Lightbulb, seriously. I appreciate that you're worried about me, but there's nothing wrong. I'm just a bit tired, that's all." They scrubbed their hands aggressively, feeling anger build up inside them. Not again. I just got her. I can't lose her this fast.

    "Yeah, okay, you're tired. Sure, but there's something else there!" She doesn't know she's pushing it.

    "Come on Painty! Please!" She doesn't mean to.

    "I just want you to feel better!" Lightbulb begged, grabbing their shoulder.

    Paintbrush lost themself. They whipped around, slamming their kitchen towel on the floor, "Don't you ever just shut the fuck up? I told you already, Lightbulb, I'm fine and I don't need your help! I don't need anyone! I don't need- I don't need help..."

    They realized they were yelling. They realized what they were doing. They'd done it before and swore to never do it again, but they did. They couldn't control it. Every one of their friends met the same fate, an outburst of screams from them, then a meltdown.

    A small tear ran down their freckled cheek, landing on the floor beneath them. They stumbled back and leaned against the counter behind them, covering their face with their hands in grief, "Go, Lightbulb... just go... you can't stay, I'll just keep yelling at you."

    They heard footsteps like always. The person left, never to interact with them again. But this time it was different. The footsteps weren't moving away from them, they were coming towards them.

    They felt cold hands on their waist that cautiously wrapped around them in a hug. "I'm not very good at... knowing things," Lightbulb's quiet voice muttered, "but I do know one thing. You're not okay, Paintbrush. You're not fine. You keep telling yourself that because you're... you're too scared to face the problem."

    Paintbrush sniffled, still too ashamed to look Lightbulb in the face. They heard a small crackling noise, then felt Lightbulb's knuckle under their chin. She lifted it to look at her as they lowered their hands from their tear-soaked face. There, in front of their now uncovered mouth, Lightbulb held a fry, "But you're not alone anymore. You have me and Test Tube and Fan. We're here for you. I'm here for you. Just tell me when you need me, okay?" She smiled softly, her eyes shimmering.

    A sigh escaped Paintbrush's lips as they bit down on the fry Lightbulb held in front of their mouth. They chewed on it gratefully, the intensity of their hunger coming to light as the savory taste entered their mouth. "Okay, Lightbulb," they chuckled, swallowing the fry, "I... I need you."

     Lightbulb smiled excitedly and patted their shoulder, pulling away from the hug, "Good job, Painty. I'm proud of you for admitting that you need help." It felt like a giant weight was lifted off of them. They couldn't describe how free their mind was. She stayed, she helped, and she cared. That's all they needed, and it's what she gave.

    They'd never asked for help before. It felt weird to have, kind of like they were admitting defeat. Their father told them to never step down, and that if they ever asked for help they wouldn't accomplish anything. That challenge and struggle were good for them and made them grow as a person.

    But those two things are what got them stuck in the first place.

    "Before we start, uhm, how are you so... experienced with this?" Paintbrush questioned as Lightbulb led them up to their room with their food in her hand, "You just- you handled the situation so well, then you turn around and don't check if the front door is unlocked before trying to get into someone's house."

    Lightbulb shrugged as she reached the top of the staircase, turning around and waiting for them to catch up, "I used to be like you, in a way I guess." Her face darkened a moment but returned to her usual sweet smile.

    "In elementary school, my parents noticed something off about me. Well, 'off'," she held up air quotes, "I wasn't interested in the things that boys my age liked. I mean I liked dinosaur things, dinosaurs are sick, but clothing-wise. I always dressed up and I loved girly Disney movies. They sat me down one day and asked me 'Do you feel like a boy?' and I said no. They let me express myself and I found out I was trans a few years later. But just because I knew what I was didn't mean I was happy."

A/N// funny story, I was writing pb yelling in second period and I started tearing up 😃👍 anyways THEY'RE GETTING BETTER!!!! literally these few chapters have been FILLED with lore and angst so eat up my pookie shmookie wookie bears 😘

just a reminder to anyone who needs to hear it, you're doing amazing and keep it up! I'm so proud of you for making it this far :)

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