Secrets

46

It was Sunday morning and I can still feel the pain. But not as much as yesterday. Igor left early in the morning for pain killers. I took the pain killers and Nicole carried me to get breakfast.

Igor came back with cereal and I started eating. My mind drifted to everything I needed to fix in my life. I needed to find my best friend.

We are taking an early flight. It's currently 9am and Nicole is giving me a bath. He was gentle not to cause any pain.

After he was done he got me dressed in shorts and Igor's shirt and socks. Igor came out dressed in his pilot uniform. He changed my bandaid. "Jasper came in and Igor spoke to him about something. Nicole was done and came out wearing the uniform.

They kissed me good bye as they had to prepare for take off. Our flight was for 12 and it's 10:45.

Jasper and I cuddled talking about random subjects. "I missed having you" he said and I agreed. Once I get home I have a person to torture.

"You know everyone's been looking at me. How are you feeling " I asked him. "I'm -" I cut him.

"That's a lie. " I said. "Tell me what's wrong" he just turned away. "hey what's going on I know there's something we can do" I said holding his chin.

"Hey come on please Jasper. It hurts me so much to know that your suffering from the inside let me in" I said with tears knocking on my eyelids.

"I..IV been so lost I've been losing my mind" he said as his voice cracked up. I hugged him tightly.

"They didn't even see it" he was crying at this point. " I thought that they didn't care. I've lived half of my time with that mentality. I've been so wrong. They...they love me"

"They love Canon. They love you. They love us. They actually care. We have people who love us" he said.

"Another thing is. I don't think that therapy is the way to go. I've been in and out of therapy and it's done nothing much to my way of living." He said I couldn't help but let the tears fall.

"I've found what helps me calm down. It's you. My sister. Knowing that your safe and happy brings me great joy. I was watching you enjoy yourself with those guys "Jasper said.

"You mean Nicole and Igor?" I asked him and he chuckled. "yeah those gorillas with veins" he said making me laugh. "they are not gorillas with veins."

"Non the less I want this to last. I want my family with me. I want to live a happy life. I want our happy ever after as a family. " he said while hugging me.

It isn't must to ask. I promise that what ever it takes I'll make it happen. "We will get our happy ever after. You'll get married and have kids and grow old with your partner" I said

"I know that it hurts Cecilia so why don't talk about your problems. Your struggling " Jasper said.

"It hurts when I remember and I never wanna feel that again."