Gentle touch

Number seven

After so long, she'd thought that the nightmares had ceased completely, becoming a mere habit of her adolescence. This night proved her prior hypothesis wrong, waking up with a thin layer of sweat across her body, tears spilling out of eyes that had just opened. She covered her mouth, muffling a choked sob.

Then she felt it, and she felt like a thirteen year old girl again. There was no way to hide it this time, she couldn't go and wash the sheets at three am, feeling fear every time she heard someone get a glass of water, afraid they'd stumble across her in the laundry room.

Now she was left without her defences, she was a princess stuck in a tower, metaphorically and almost literally.

There was this odd feeling inside of her, this longing for comfort, but not just from anyone. She longed for Daisy to hold her close, to hear Lottie whispering sweet nothings. Alexa wanted to feel repulsed at this, she wanted to be bathed in a bath of self loathing, but she couldn't handle so many things at once. Alexa settled for the feeling she had yet to name.

The girl sat up, grabbing her pillow and screaming into it. She pulled her knees to her chest, placing the pillow in the gap between her legs and her body, shoving her face into the pillow. Her sobs were muted by the pillow, and it almost felt nice. If she shut her eyes tight enough, she was seventeen again, afraid to wake her family in the ungodly morning hours.

Except she hated being seventeen, and it wasn't worth the pain she would prolong.

"Mommy?" She called out, throwing the pillow onto the other side of the bed. Instead, she opted for Chase, placing the stuffed animal against her knees. She waited impatiently, there was no sounds to be heard, and she hated the thought of being alone. "Mommy!" She called out once more, biting down on her bottom lip.

She couldn't remember ever being this needy as a child.

"Do you need the bathroom again sweetie?" Daisy tiredly spoke, opened the door to the room, florescent lighting filling the room . The words almost sent the girl into another round of robbing. Shakily, she shook her head, her bottom lip wobbling. The woman was confused for a moment, before it clicked.

"Oh Lexie, you don't need to cry, it's my fault for not coming quick enough." Daisy comforted the girl, Lexie felt guilty, thinking the woman was blaming herself. She shook her head once again, "it wasn't you, it was me." Lexie whispered, incoherent words.

At this point, Daisy stood in front of the bars, she put a hand through the bars, stroking the girls cheek. "Accident's happen." Daisy assured her, "n-not to me!" Lexie argued. She hid her face in her hands

A few moments later, she was pulled into the woman's arms. She buried her face with Daisy's shoulder, which offered a lot more comfort than her pillow.

Her back was rubbed as she cried, and then her hair was stroked as she cried some more.

There was nobody to blame but herself, she couldn't pin the nightmares on the women, this could've and would've happened at home. So she allowed herself a blip of vulnerability, holding out a piece of her heart to Daisy.

When she was finished, she was sure she had been drained completely, no more tears to even shed. Daisy took the girl into the bathroom, and she placed the girl down. She held her hands on the girl's shoulders, keeping Lexie balanced, her legs threatening to buckle at first. "You're okay, everything is okay."

~~

She had felt embarrassed in the morning, refusing to even meet Daisy's eye. Alexa hoped the event wouldn't be brought up, for there to be yet another act in the circus she found her life to be. Alexa gave Daisy the cold shoulder, and it annoyed her how Daisy didn't seem to mind, allowing Lottie to get the girl dressed for the day instead. She had been relieved when Daisy dismissed herself to work.