Chapter 17

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Luke's POV


After leaving the airport, we drive to the hospital to see my mom. I want to see her immediately and make sure she's doing okay. I'm worried about her, and even though everyone keeps telling me she's okay, I won't believe it until I see her.

The car ride feels like it takes forever. I anxiously chew on my bottom lip and constantly ask if we're almost at the hospital. Everyone is getting annoyed with me, but I can't help it. I need to see my mom.

After about half an hour of driving, we finally make it to the hospital. I want to go in, but at the same time, I don't. I stare at the plain, gray building that is all too familiar.

"Are you ready to go see her?" Calum asks, turning to look at me from the front seat. My dad and grandparents look over at me, none of them saying anything.

I'm suddenly hit with a bunch of nerves at the thought of being here and seeing my mom. I was anxious before, but it feels like all my nerves decided to attack me at once.

I take a deep breath. "Yeah, let's go."

We follow Calum to the front door and into the hospital. I recognize everything vividly from the amount of times I was here last year. Everything I tried so hard to not think about all this time is creeping back into my mind. The hospital, especially this one, holds a lot of horrible memories for me. When I left the hospital for the last time months ago, I vowed to never return. I knew I wouldn't be able to do that, but I wasn't expecting to be back within a year. I feel my breathing start to quicken with each step I take through the corridor.

"Wait, just give me a sec," I say quietly, leaning against the wall.

"What's wrong?" my dad asks nervously.

"It's fine, I'm fine. Just a little panic attack. I'm okay, I promise." I focus on my breathing and try not to concentrate on my racing heart and shaking hands.

Panic attacks can frequently be triggered by places that they've occurred before or places that remind someone of having a panic attack. Of course, one had to be triggered now. I was nervous enough to see my mom and now this just had to happen.

"Do you need anything?" Calum asks.

I shake my head. "No, no. I'll be okay. Don't worry," I say, quietly.

I sit down in the hallway since my legs are somewhat shaky and lean my head against the wall.

"Hey, Dad? Do you think you could go see her first? And tell me what kind of condition she's in? Just so I know what to expect," I ask.

My dad hesitantly nods. "Yeah, of course."

"I'll stay with Luke. She's in room 602," Calum tells my dad.

My grandparents and dad leave to go see my mom. Calum sits down beside me and looks over at me with sad eyes.

"Anything I can do?" he asks.

I shake my head. "I just need to relax. I know how to handle it now."

"Alright. You're mom was doing pretty well earlier. If that makes you feel better."

I smile and nod. "She knows I'm here, right?"

Calum nods. "She was really happy when I told her."

After a few minutes, I calm myself down. It didn't get too out of control, thankfully. My dad and grandparents come back, and I'm actually ready to go this time.

My dad tells me that I don't have to be too worried. She is just tired, less talkative, and more pale. She's attached to some machines, which I expected. Even with my dad's reassurance that I'll be fine, there's still some butterflies in my stomach.

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