Dear Diary Delivery

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Chapter 5: Dear Diary Delivery

Kitianna's POV

I sat alone after waking up. Replaying my life in my head, who am I? Why was I still alive? My life is nothing anymore I was just a hollow broken shell. A nobody. I barely even existed.

NO! I had to stay alive, I can't give up...not yet. So to keep my mind off of these thoughts I grabbed my iPod and once again listened to music.

(A/N All lyrics belong to Rita Skeeter and recording company)

Why does the sun go on shining?

Why does the sea rush to shore?

Don't they know its the end of the world cause you don't love me any more.

Why do the birds go on singing?

Why do the stars glow above?

Don't they know its the end of the world it ended when I lost your love.

Why does my heart go on beating?

Why do these eyes of mine cry?

I was occupied with the song I didn't notice the knocking on the door. When I finally noticed I went towards not bothering to wipe my tears.

I knew it was just Shay and I could just tell her I was watching a sad movie or something she always bought it anyways. Imagine my surprise when I opened the door and looked into the swirling orbs of

Zander's eyes. He looked tired huffing and he looked furious but his eyes softened when they came to look at me.

Zander's POV

I looked into her eyes. I felt my wolf start to calm down. I noticed there were tears on her face again. She noticed my gaze and quickly wiped the tears with the sleeve of her sweater.

She was so cute, so innocent and most of all mine. She finally broke the silence. "Umm w-what are y-you doing here?" She was so uncertain and so nervous it was so cute except for the hint of fear in her voice.

"You left your wallet behind when I bumped into you I just came to return it" she looked surprised. "Thank y-you" she stuttered out.

"No problem" I replied. "I'll catch you tomorrow bye" I knew she was nervous and tired. I'de let her rest but tomorrow she would be all mine.

Kitianna's POV

After Zander left I decided I needed to catch some sleep. But sadly the nightmares would always be there...to remind me.

Zander's POV

When I left I noticed she dropped another book in front of her dorm. It was a notebook she used as her diary. I shook my head as I picked it up, she sure had a habit of dropping things.

I was about to give it up but then thought what better way to get to know her than read her diary? I got back to the cafe shortly and then took the car with Will and Damon.

When we got to the pack house I grabbed the book and began to read. I flipped to a random page and began.

::November 14th

The nightmares. They're back. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't I just can't. I had another panic attack. It was horrifying thank god Shay wasn't home. I couldn't be a burden I already am for mom and dad. They used to call but now, nothing, no one. Am I really that much of a bother. I'm invisible. I'm nobody. I can't wait for the day, when I have to stop pretending I'm strong. I am merely a shell now. There is no Kit, she disappeared 5 years ago. ::

I couldn't believe what I was reading, what happened 5 years ago that made her so miserable?

I flipped to the recent pages nod ended up on the one for the day I met her.

::May 17th

I bumped into Zander today! I can't believe it, I will admit he is good looking. But when I bumped into him, I felt...sparks? I think, I don't know. Maybe he'll save me from this abyss of memories, who am I kidding?! No one wants this hollow shell, it's not just worthless. It's broken. I finished another book. It was amazing!!! It's the book Shay told me to read, I didn't like the plot but I felt happy for the girl in the end. At least she was happy, at least her werewolf mate accepted her. I really do wish someone would save me but I know that I am to far gone for any kind of salvation. ::

I closed the diary and pulled out the picture I took from her wallet. I would get the old Kit back, and keep her to myself because she is M.I.N.E.

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A/N

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE VOTES AND COMMENTS MY FELLOW WATTPADIENS

I'll try to update ASAP!

So Live Long and Prosper.

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