Impudent [Jasper Hale]

twenty two ; need you now

It was a few minutes past one a.m., and I still hadn't registered what happened earlier that day. I couldn't bring my mind to comprehend the fact that werewolves were real, and that Paul was one.

Paul was supposed to be different than everyone else. I've never been with someone who lost his temper so easily, and laughed so lightly, and ate so much. 

He was different than all of my exes and crushes, and yet, he was just like Jasper, in some way.

And that bothered me to no end.

I took another swing of the corona beer bottle that sat next to me, still staring at the wall. Werewolves and vampires, what's next?

Ghosts.

I stood up immediately, suddenly feeling an amount of fear I have never before felt. I was overwhelmed by a world that was supposed to be a legend, and I didn't have anyone to help me breathe. I suddenly realized I wasn't breathing properly, each breath louder than the one before and my lungs feeling like they were exploding.

I wanted Jasper to be there.

I tiptoed my way down the hallway, opening the door to my dad's bedroom, hoping he would be awake, but getting rewarded with his snores. I blinked my tears, before stepping in, and after few moments of hesitation, entered the king size bed.

I inched closer to him, and I heard his snores losing their rhythm.

"Ashley?" he half muttered in a croaked whisper.

"I just need my dad right now," I told him, eyes shut. "Can I please sleep with you?"

"Of course sweetheart," he said, hugging me closer. 

His breaths never returned to be as calm as before I entered the room, throughout the whole night, but he never released the hug, and whenever my breaths got slightly less calm, he soothed me back to the almost-sleep blessed space I was at before by patting my back in the same soothing circles he used back when I was at the hospital, back when each time I fell asleep, I woke up to my own screams.

►

When I opened my eyes, Charlie was no longer laying next to me. 

But Jasper was.

Out of instinct, I took a slight distance away from him. I looked up to his face; he was reading a book, and as a reaction to me moving away, he's changed his position, so he was leaning away from me.

"Jas?" I questioned once I had found the courage to speak. "What are you doing here?"

"Edward called me last night, he said your thought sounded..." Jasper trailed off, and I knew that he refrained from saying whatever Edward told him about my thoughts, that probably sounded utterly unstable. "And that at some point you thought that you wanted me there, with you."

"That's right," I realized. "Did he also tell you what I told him earlier? When we've spoken?"

Jasper cleared his throat, straightening up and setting down his book. "Yes."

"And?" I asked, sitting up.

"Ashley--" he started in this tortured tone of his, the one when his eyes could only look at me for a moment before guilt washed over them. I shook my head.

"Dude, it's cool," I immediately said. "If you don't want me, we're cool. We can still be buddies."

"I don't want us buddies." Jasper said, and his hand grabbed mine. "I want you, I mean, more than anything." he told me, his now golden eyes looking at mine. "But I know better than to risk you. I know that the best thing I can do for you with the amount of love I am feeling towards you, is stay the hell away."

"Fuck, Jasper, you just don't understand, do you?" I questioned, shaking my head with a scoff. "I couldn't care less about what's best for me. I don't know if you've noticed, but I am a magnet for jerks, and if I managed to attract a single person who isn't a jerk, I'm not gonna pass that up just because he's a vampire. And just so you know, if I didn't have morning breath, I'd kiss you right now just to prove my point."

"I don't mind your morning breath."

☼

"ASHLEY!" a voice called, and I frowned, recognizing it. Jasper left shortly after we kissed, his smile as large as mine, and both Charlie and Bella were still at work (Bella worked at the shop Mike's parents owned, she recently started working), though both of them were supposed to come back soon as it was already evening.

The voice called once more, "Ashley! Let me in!"

So I sighed, walking downstairs and opening the front door. Paul appeared in a few moments with a smile. 

"Hi Paul," I said nervously, half-expecting him to turn into a wolf again. His smile made him look unharmful, almost like a puppy, and for a moment I wanted it to be the day before, when we were still just us, and I was still trying to convince myself that learning to love him will benefit me.

"Ashley," he smiled, taking a step closer, before flinching away. "Holy fuck what is this smell?"

"I hadn't showered today yet," I admitted, ashamed.

"No, it's... A rotten smell of some sort." he said, "like... I dunno."

"Vampires?" I questioned, and he raised his eyebrows.

"Vampires?"

"The Cullens. Bella is dating one, and... well," I grinned all of a sudden, "I think I am too."

"Oh."

"Oh," I realized, looking at Paul. His eyebrows were furrowed, and he looked like he was in slight pain. "I mean, I just... it's been going on for a while," I said, attempting to explain, but he seemed even angrier, "I tried to make it go away, and I wanted to be with you... But yesterday..."

I heard a snarl, and a moment too late I realized it was coming from Paul.

"Fuck."

But just before he transformed, something shoved him away from me, and I blinked my eyes, relieved to see Jared and Sam. Upon a closer look I realized they both had a matching tattoo, and thinking hard, I realized Paul had it too.

"I apologize for my brother being an asshole," Jared spoke as Sam transformed in front of my eyes, the two of them disappearing. "And... be careful."

"I will."

"You're always welcomed at the rez." I smiled lightly, kissing Jared's cheek.

"And you're always welcomed at my home," I hesitated for a moment. "All of you."

He nodded with a smile, before he walked off, and I took a deep breath, knowing that a crisis was averted at the last moment thanks to Sam. 

I walked into an unfamiliar world, and I realized that I was embracing it much more easily than I should have. Much more easily than a sane person should.

So with another deep breath, I shut the door and walked to the living room, where I turned on the TV, trying to keep my mind off of everything weird, but the only interesting thing on TV was Buffy.

How fucking fitting.