A Walk Through Hell (Boyxboy)

Chapter 10- The Bathroom Scene

“Maybe he’s decided he likes Australia after all,” I offered. Shane glared at me. “Shut up for a second, okay?” I rolled my eyes and mocked him while taking a sip of his smoothie. He’d ordered it organic, and soy milk instead of yogurt, just so we could share it. I had trouble digesting lactose. Damn anorexia. He dialed Jay’s number once again, and this time he picked up, because Shane growled, “Where are you?” into the phone. He rolled his eyes before hanging up.

“He’s just now getting his luggage.” He took my hand and completely dragged me to the luggage area, scouting the place for Jay. I didn’t see why he was so impatient; I mean he was just a stupid guy. A guy about to ruin our already fucked relationship. I frowned, sipping the drink angrily.

“I see him!” Shane announced, relieved. “Wonderful,” I uttered, already bored of this. We met up with a very tall, very handsome guy. I wanted to cry because the color of his eyes was gold and his black hair was perfect atop his head. His stubble was even perfect. He looked like an Italian model. But that was crazy because he was Australian. I wanted to shove him right back on that plane. He wasn’t just a stupid guy. “Shane, my goodness, you’ve grown.” He went in for a hug, and Shane let go of my hand, wrapping his arms around him. After they pulled apart, Shane turned to me. “Jay, this is Zander, my boyfriend. Zander, this is Jay.” I waved at him. I was absolutely terrified now. And I felt a panic attack coming on, but I had to swallow it. Or at least try. This was ridiculous. How many times was I going to freak out before I finally realized that people were attractive and I should get over myself? Just because I wasn’t particularly good looking at first doesn’t mean everyone else isn’t.

“It’s nice to meet you, Zander.” I nodded. “Likewise.” Shane grabbed my hand again and led us out of the airport, talking to Jay the whole way. I just listened to the two of them, miserable. In the car, I sat in the back. Not by choice, but by default. Jay put took the front seat. He even made Shane stop by a random ass food place and buy him fries.

Back at Shane's apartment, Shane went to get blankets and an extra pillow or two for Jay to use when he slept on the couch. So he and I were left alone. And it was not only awkward but he was staring at me. Intensely. "What?" I asked shyly. He shrugged. "Nothing. I'm just surprised you're even here. What with me hogging your boyfriend. To think you'd be jealous," he had a smug look on his face. "Stay away from him," I said through a clenched jaw. "You're jealous." I glared up at him.

Before anything else could be said, Shane came back with his hands full. And I moved out of the way again, hoping to not be of much trouble to the two. I was happy for Shane, in a way. But I didn't want to be left out. I didn't want to feel like the third wheel in my own relationship. Shane turned do me. "Come watch a movie with us. Do you want to pick it?" I shook my head. "Actually my head hurts, so I'm going to go lay down." He frowned but nodded, picking a random movie and putting it in the DVD player. I turned around and headed for his bedroom. Before I could reach his door, he was pulling me into a hug.

"Are you feeling okay?" He asked. I nodded into his chest. "Yeah. My head-"

"That's bullshit." I pulled away from him. "I'm going to lie down regardless." I muttered before entering his room closing the door firmly. He always knew when I was lying. I should thank him for that but at the same time he was so dense. He didn't know why I was lying. He thought it was jealousy. And so had I. But it was something much worse than that. It was something that tore me down and made me into nothing. I could rot from the way I was feeling inside. It was so dead inside. So ugly. I needed to be loved.

***

"I know you're not sleeping. We need to talk." I sighed and turned on the bed so I was facing Shane. "About what?" I asked. "Why the hell have you been avoiding Jay like the black plague?" I shut my eyes. "I don't want to talk about it."