"So there's this guy " I smiled sitting on the bed talking to Shawn "he's the cutest thing in the whole wide world, he so nice and caring, I remember when we first met in middle school " I laughed "he uses to get on my damn nerves but we end up becoming best friends, me him and another girl, by the time we got to the 8th grade we were stuck together at the hip" I smile just thinking about it
"You knew you wanted me," he said
"I didn't, I knew you were bad for me " I laughed
"Don't laugh too hard you might pee yourself " I stopped right away and laid back on the bed and he came over and rubbed my stomach
"Papa loves you okay ? You, your mommy, and your sister not gonna never want for anything, y'all are my everything and I'm gonna do everything in my power to keep all 3 of y'all happy okay ?" He said rubbing my stomach ,these be the best feeling ever when he lay on my lower half and rubs my stomach until I fall asleep
"I love you," I said
"I love you too" he replied
I woke up out of my sleep and ran to the bathroom throwing up everything I had eaten, when I was done I washed out my mouth and face and lean against the counter
"You okay ?" Shawn asked walking inside the bathroom, I just shook my head no "what's wrong ?" He questioned
"All this throwing up I hate it " I sobbed, he rubbed my back to calm me down
"Calm down everything gonna be okay " he continued, he picked me up and carried me inside the room and I just cuddled up against him. I couldn't even go back to sleep. I know it's a little bit too late but, am I ready? Is Shawn really ready ? We been waiting for this since our 10th grade year and here I am being a bitch. What is fucking life? "Go to sleep " he mumbled
"I'm trying" I whined, he sat up on the bed and pulled me closer to him
"So what's up ?" He questioned
"Like Shawn is we ready? I know we have been wanting this for the longest and it's too fucking late for us to back out but we are in this together, we not kids anymore. This is real fucking life, I just don't want you to hurt me as you did before." I cried
"Listen when I say I got you I mean it, we are in this together, and trust me I'm going to put a ring on that finger sooner then you think " he stated, "now go back to sleep and don't worry too much, we got this okay ?" I nodded my head "I love you" he said kissing my forehead
"I love you too"
I couldn't even go back to sleep, I was just sitting here reminiscing about my past. It's like my life just did a complete 360. Why I went through certain things? Maybe I should have stayed with Shawn. God put me in a certain situation for a reason. Taught Me a lesson I learned it and I'm blessed. I started putting everything in God's hands instead of trying to take control of everything.
