The Virals

Chapter 20

The void. The void was there, whirring. His friends. His friends were there, blank and expressionless.

He. He was there

For a moment, Black Talon was confused, but then, he understood:

This is what it is to be a viral.

He turned around, and saw his friends behind him. Suddenly, an explosion of emotions filled his soul- sorrow, nostalgia, melancholy, anger, wistfulness. He knew they wouldn't listen to him. He knew their love and affection was all but gone, gone forever.

I'm going to be tormented for the rest of my days, aren't I? He thought to himself, staring at them. This is my punishment. This is my punishment for that single stupid year of happiness.

He sat down as he felt a strange cramp in his chest and stomach, and his heart speeding up.

Why did I exist? Why was I even born? What was my purpose in life? I barely did anything. I was just a useless nuisance to everyone, wasn't I? If I never came to existence, they would have remained happy just the same, probably happier. All those packs who I tried to join before, only to remain unaccepted and get thrown out of, they certainly would have fared better if they never knew me. Most of them didn't like me anyway. This life has been all but a massive waste. Now all I'm going to do is mindlessly attack others.

Tears began brimming at his eyes, but he held them back.

I just... I just didn't want to be such a pathetic failure anymore...

He turned to look at his friends.

'Razor Feather,' He approached her, feeling his heart heave. 'I... I never really showed it much, but you... you could make me laugh with so much ease... all the crazy things we used to do, all the jokes... I miss them. I just wish things didn't turn out this way...'

He moved onwards.

'Thorn Tooth... I always found our conversations to be fascinating... and your loyalty, it was impressive. You were a good listener... I'm so sorry that you became a viral completely alone... you didn't deserve to experience such a horror...'

He sighed, and shut his eyes (he still had both in the void). He walked over to the final one.

'Fleet Claw...' A single tear trickled down his face. 'I... I came to trust you more than anyone... you showed me more affection than I had ever experienced before, and I began to look up to you as a true friend. I never understood why you were so nice to me. You almost gave me hope. Almost. You nearly opened me up. Nearly. You came so close... But it's all gone now...'

He collapsed to the floor, weeping. 'I'll never understand why any of you ever wanted to befriend me in the first place!' He shuddered, tears spilling from his eyes and dripping onto the ground like rain. He breathed, trying to calm himself.

Maybe they never did.

'...Last year was the best time of my life. But Life didn't want that... It took everything away...'

He got up, trembling as he tried to keep everything inside. He moved backwards, away from Fleet Claw, towards the middle of the group. He wanted all of them to hear the next thing he had to say.

He looked at them, one by one. Then, with great difficulty, he said:

'I loved all of you!'

He collapsed again, putting his hands on his head, whimpering and sobbing. They all ignored him. He couldn't stop crying, he couldn't stop the way his heart burned, the way his stomach twisted. Breaking down, he began to feel the crippling loneliness, the pain of loss. It was all coming back.