The Lost Morgensterns

Chapter 10 - Nefarious

Nefarious (adj.)
(typically of an action or activity) wicked or criminal

Clarissa P.O.V.

I set to finish dinner, Sera helping me, and everyone else went into the living room to wait. 

"Can I help?" Isabelle asked, coming into the kitchen.

"Sure." I said plainly.

It only took two minutes for Isabelle to successfully destroy and burn the whole dinner. "Sorry!" She shrieked.

"It's fine." I said sighing. I really don't care. My mind is just set on what I'm about to have to tell them. "I'll order Takis." Takis was a restaurant I found that was for the Shadow world.

I took out my phone, and ordered a bunch of food. Once I hung up, I warily walked into the living room, Isabelle and Sera behind me. 

Everyone looked up as they saw me. "Isabelle burnt all the food." I said plainly. "I just ordered Takis."

Jace smirked, despite the situation. "Izzy's food is deadly. We should have kept her out of the kitchen."

I smiled slightly. 

Just then the doorbell rang. "That was fast." Magnus said surprised.

Well, it was fast because I sort of threatened the person... What? I'm hungry. I opened the door to see a werewolf with a bunch of bags of food. I took the food. "I trust you won't tell anybody about me or my location werewolf." I said emotionlessly, turning my eyes black. I don't like to do this, but I have to make sure we are in no danger.

The man's eyes were terrified, and he nodded swiftly and practically ran to his truck. I rolled my now back to green eyes and closed the door.

When I turned back, all eyes were on me. "You've got to stop doing that Clares." Seb said smirking. I rolled my eyes and placed the food on a table Magnus had just conjured up.

"Take whatever you guys want." I said, sitting down in a chair.

They all took a seat, and it was silent for a few minutes with people getting their food. Then they were all just staring at me.

I sighed and looked down at my plate. "About one year ago." I said plainly. "Me, Jon, and Seb were off demon hunting. Our sensors led us to an abandoned ally, but when we got there we couldn't see any demons." I took a deep breath. "Then I was grabbed from behind, and before I knew what was happening I was on the other side of the ally, being held up by the hair by a demon." I squeezed my eyes shut. "It bit me in the neck, and I screamed. It was terribly painful. Jon and Seb came running, and the demon started whispering things in a demon language. I don't know what kind of demon it was, or what it did to me. Then it dropped me to the ground. I couldn't move, not even my eyes. I didn't know what was happening, but it felt like something was growing inside of me. It grew bigger and bigger, more and more painful until I thrashed and jumped out of Jon's arms." I buried my face in my hands, not wanting to see any of their expressions.

"It was like I wasn't in control of my body." I continued quietly. "I took out a dagger, and threw it at Jon's shoulder." I took a deep breath. "I only remember faintly what happened that night. But I had woke up in some ally, covered in blood. But it wasn't my blood." I took a shaky breath. They were going to hate me after I told them everything. "I had killed people. From what I remember about a dozen mundanes and a couple dozen Downworlders. I went back home, and told Jon and Seb everything." My head was still in my hands, and my eyes were squeezed shut tightly. "Sera, Val, I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But we figured you didn't need another thing to worry about." I was silent for a few seconds.

"It happens about every three months." I said. "I can't control it, and it always happens after I create a rune. But the runes are always for something evil. The one I made today was for making demonic weapons." Another shaky breath. "I can turn evil if I want to, or if I get really mad. Which is bad, because I have a short temper.

"Today I went through one of my portals to an abandoned forest in Europe. We had figured it would be fine for me there, because I wouldn't be able to hurt anybody." I made a noise that was almost a sob, but I quickly tried to cover it up. "It happened that there was a family camping nearby." I heard a sob, and opened my eyes a tiny bit to see it was Isabelle. "I'm a monster." I said emotionlessly, and stood up and left to my room. I had just realized I wasn't hungry.

Jace P.O.V.

It was silent for a few minutes. I was trying to take it all in. She thought she was a monster for what happens, but I don't. She has no control over it. I looked over to Isabelle, and she was wiping her tears. Shadowhunters don't cry much, but hearing all the terrible things that happened to this beautiful girl is just too much.

"I think it's time for you guys to leave." Jon said, standing up, his face emotionless. "You can finish the food if you want."

Alec nodded. I stood up, not hungry anymore. Everyone else did the same, and we all piled out the door. 

Magnus and Simon had to go the opposite way, so we mumbled 'bye's. 

All these things were running through my mind as I walked back towards the Institute with Alec and Izzy. This beautiful, beautiful girl has been through so much. Wait. Did I just call her beautiful? I've called girls hot or sexy before, but never beautiful. But she is. She's beautiful and strong and artistic and guarded. I'm just aching to get past her walls. I want to get to know her.

"I think we should go back tomorrow." I said out of the blue, because we had all been walking in silence. 

"Are you crazy?" Alec said as at the same time Izzy said "Definitely."

They looked at each other with confused expressions, then back at me. "Are both of you crazy?" Alec exclaimed. Before we could contradict he continued. "She is dangerous. And not just her, her whole family in fact. She could get mad, and like she said, she's short tempered, and she could end up killing us all!"

"Don't be silly Alec." I said rolling my eyes.

His eyes narrowed. "Why do you care so much? Why do you keep insisting we go back there? And you too Iz." He said turning his glare to her.

Isabelle shrugged. "I like Clary. I think we'd be awesome friends."

Alec rolled his eyes and looked to me. I sighed. "I don't know, I like their family." I said simply, holding back the part that I think I might be developing feelings for a certain redhead.

They both stared at me for a second before Izzy squealed. "What?" I asked, confused.

"You like her!" Izzy said, totally ecstatic.

"I-I do not." I stuttered. I mentally cursed myself. JACE HERONDALE DOES NOT STUTTER.

Izzy's smile grew until it looked like it was going to fall of her face. Even Alec was smirking a little.

I groaned and started walking fast again towards the Institute, leaving them in their tracks smiling and chuckling. 

I mentally cursed my two adoptive siblings. Even if what they said was true. I'm accepting it. I'm falling, and I'm falling hard for Clarissa Morgenstern.