I Dared To Call Him Husband (The Man I Married)

5

Zuriel

I was seated on a bench in aunt Doreen garden wiping away the tears that won't stop running down my cheeks,just a week and a day into this marriage and I wanted desperately to come out of it. Miles my husband even though I wished he wasn't won't stop making me feel like the worst a person could ever be,always ready to insult me whenever I make a wrong move. He had insulted me and called me a pauper from a wretched family that gave their daughter out to just anyone because he was rich because I had spilled strawberry juice on his shirt when we bump into each other at the corridor.
This is not the kind of husband I have wished to have and certainly not this kind of life, where I have no choices and have the feeling that am worth nothing and my husband never cease a chance to tell me how much of a burden I am to him. And all those things makes my heart constrict in pain,but what can I say "it's condition that makes cray fish bend",I chose this life by saying yes and I have to live it and take the pain even though I so much want to question God at the moment but the facts that everything happen for  good is keeping me away from complaining.
But the remembrance of what mom always says "if you think your situation is bad someone's is worst,think you have someone has more,think you're good someone is better and another is best" is causing my heart to ache in longing for my poor  wretched parents as Miles as previously called but closely knitted family. I know back there I could never get the kind of life am living now with everything at my disposal and every item of comfort but it was a happy life in which I felt wanted, loved,cared for and not a burden unlike my present life,I thought as I wiped away the stray tears from my eyes and sniffed with a sad smile on my face. I want badly to go back to my previous life where I lack but was contented,not comfortable but happy, I prefer happiness to comfort and the only places I've always gotten that was from dad,mom,my brother and sister, they always give me the security I've ever needed, at this moment I was like a child crying for it's mother. I open and closed my mouth so I wouldn't make a sound at the same time trying to still my shaking foot as I massage my head due to the sharp piercing I was feeling in my skull.
No matter how hard I tried the tears won't go back and then I found myself gasping for air due to the enormous tears shedding. My lips quivered and my left leg won't stop shaking, I pressed my lips together to hold in a gasp but they betrayed and another gasp escape them as I try to wife off my tears with the back of my hand. I felt a hand behind my back which caused me to leaped to my feet in shock and I staggered for a while before finally gaining a firm balance on the ground. I pressed my fingers against my head in an attempt to ease
the piercing sensation that was shooting through it but my effort proved futile as the pain increased by every passing seconds and I felt more and more dizzy with time.
 
"Hey are you okay?" A voice asked and I recognised it as Louis's.

I attempt nodding in response but it made my head more heavier and I stopped midway. My legs became wobbly and my head pounded the more in drowsiness. I put forward a hand trying to find something to lean on for support with my eyes closed but I found none. At that moment my stomach became empty and I felt light weighted and I knew I had cried way too much and these were the after effects of my action. I needed my glasses that moment but they were metres away from my present location. I could sense Louis presence and his eyes lingering around me but I dared not to give him a glance because I didn't want him to sight my tears and I wasn't ready to open my eyes because I didn't want to experience that amount of dizziness that causes one to feel like their eyes had increased size and are going round and round like a rollercoaster without a cause.

I took a step forward my eyes still shut,but my legs couldn't hold my weight anymore and I felt them giving way as my foot twisted and I felt myself going down but for some reason I didn't touch the ground because an arm was wrapped around my shoulders keeping me up.

"Are you fine?" Louis demanded but this time I made no attempt to answer. I kept still for awhile trying to gain my composure while he wrapped his hands tighter around my shoulders and I felt grateful for the support.