Flashing Lights

17 - A grumpy B

Even though Hunter had said he would keep trying, he actually didn't.
He kept his distance, barely talking to me in the past two days. I have no idea what made him change his mind. 

The thing is, you never know with him.
And I always need to know.
It's how I'm wired. 

You see why we would never work, right?
Even if I was a little attracted to him...maybe...sort of...

I won't let him ignoring me get to me though.
I'm going to be my very bubbly, chill self. 
Can't be that hard now, can it? 

"Millie, are you going to eat that or what? If not..." 

"Hands off Paul, I mean it. That doughnut is mine, go get your own." I whine while swatting Paul's greedy hands from my breakfast. 

"Sheees...fine... no need to get all aggressive on me. Do you want something else?"

"Yes. Coffee. Black." 

Okay, so maybe I'm a teeny bit grumpy today. 

With Paul getting my coffee, I pull out my tablet once more to make sure I've checked all the boxes on my VMA to-do list. We've been waiting in this private seating area at the airport for over an hour now, and I've checked the damn list six times.  

Is it even possible to be this nervous for something?

"Millliiiiieeeee"

Great, this just keeps getting better and better now doesn't it?
Why do these things keep happening to me every time Paul is getting me a drink? 

Is this some weird sign from the universe, warning me to get my own drinks? Is someone going to try to poison me in the near future? 

Getting sidetracked here Millie... get out of your own head. 

"Kimmy" I say, while smiling my very-polite-but-also-very-fake smile. "How may I help you?" 

"Did Hunter tell you I'm flying out to LA together with all of you?"

He didn't actually. 
I'm not going to let her know that though. 

"Yeah, I think he mentioned it the other day..."

"Oh? Ok...well...good. Do you happen to know where he is?" She smiles, her perfect white teeth hurting my eyes this early in the morning. 

I nod towards the big red sofa with a tall, dark-haired man draped across it a few feet away. 

For some reason, I'm not feeling very chatty with her today.

I eye her while she's making her way towards him and wonder if she's always wearing heels. We're at an airport at five in the morning... if I could have, I would have worn my pink fluffy slippers.
For some reason I can't seem to remember right now they just seemed a bit too casual. 

I can't make out what they're saying but Hunter shakes his head a couple of times, shrugs and then just lies back down on the sofa while covering his head with a pillow. 

I'm still not quite sure what is going on between those two. You'd think I would need to know these things as his PA now, wouldn't you? 

A normal PA would know, off course.
A PA that kisses her boss and then says it was all a huge mistake clearly doesn't.  

I startle when Paul slams my coffee in front of me. "One coffee for Milady. I asked for a double, you seem to need it."  I can't help but crack a smile, we both know he's right. 

"Thank you so much Paul. I don't know what I would do without you..."

"Easy...You'd probably be a grumpy bitch all the time."

----------

When we land in LA and the warmth of the sun touches my skin, I instantly feel reborn.
Thank you Hunter for the  private plane that comes with seats that have more than enough leg room-
to comfortably sleep in! 

I'm still nervous though. The show is tonight and I can't shake the feeling that I forgot something important. When I look at my list however - for the eleventh time by now but who's counting - all boxes are still checked. 

I've got this. 

I'm walking through the airport and I can already see all the flashing lights in the distance. 
Good thing I didn't wear those fluffy-slippers. 

"Millie, can we talk?"

Well well, look who's talking again. 

"Sure. What do you want to talk about?" 

"Kimmy."

God, please don't let him ask me dating advice.
That would be weird... and a little bit humiliating. 

I nod at him to let him know he can proceed.

"I didn't want her here, but the management wanted her to go with me. Tabloids love seeing us together and it would be bad press if we wouldn't be together on this event. You understand that right? I sometimes need to do things I'm not comfortable with. I've worked way too hard for this." He pleads and I wonder if he's trying to convince me or himself here. 

I get that. Sort of. I could never do it though. Life's too short to do things you don't want to do.
Trust me, I would know. 

"Sure Hunter, you do what you got to do. I get it. Besides, you don't have to justify yourself to me. I'm just the PA." 

"You know you're not just the PA. I think I made that pretty clear by now, but I'm not going to force you into doing something you don't want to do. Or are afraid to do. Because I think that's really the case here. You're afraid of what could happen if you let yourself feel what you're truly feeling. If you would stop fighting it. And when you finally do, I'll be here." He says all of this without looking at me. If anyone was watching us, they would think we're just walking side by side. He's well aware of the fact that people are always watching wherever he goes in public.

We're almost at the exit now and I can already hear the clicking of the camera's. 

Hunter catches up his pace so he can walk out next to Kimmy. She grabs his hand, beaming at him. Just in time before they get in sight of all the people gathered outside, all of them hoping to catch a glimpse of their idols. 

If I didn't know any better, I would actually think they look like a happy couple. 

For a second there, I kinda feel bad for Kimmy. 

Does she even know how he truly feels about her? 

How he feels about me?