Unnatural Instinct: Android

30.

Just as your mother told you, she arrives within the hour.

Again she has that bright look about her, that glowing look, which again makes you suspicious that she might be seeing a man. She looks more energised than she has in a long time. There's a skip in her step as she walks down the hallway to meet you in the dining room.

She looks at her watch in surprise. 'You're only just now having lunch? It's two-o'clock.'

Sitting down beside you, she gives you a swift, hard hug. You hug her back, wrinkling your nose at the strong waft of flowery perfume.

Pulling back, she holds your shoulders for several long moments, studying you, her lips pressed together. 'Something's different about you. You look so ... so ... pretty.'

You huff. 'Sure thing, Mum.' Turning back to your plate, you shovel in a mouthful of food.

She looks back at Hiro as he stands in the corner of the living room in sleep mode, his chin to his chest. 'He must be taking good care of you.'

'You look good too, Mum,' you say with obvious suspicion that she can't miss. Who has she been seeing?

Immediately, she drops the subject, moving onto lying about her day. As you listen and eat you begin to suspect that this mysterious man might be significantly younger than she is. You don't know why you think it. There's just something unusually youthful about her behaviour.

As she babbles on endlessly in her happy, heightened mood, she suddenly says, 'What's that on your shirt?'

You look down and discover a small blob of chocolate near your neckline. Before you can stop her, before you can do anything but watch in dismay, she scoops it off with her finger and pops it in her mouth.

'As I suspected—chocolate! What have you been up to?' She grins.

How did she know that it was even edible? It could have been dirt or poo or something else entirely (though you don't know why you'd have poo on your shirt).

But still ...

You stare at her, uncertain whether to laugh or be sick. Your throat dry, you swallow. 'I ... uh ... just felt like some. Hiro helped me.' Which is certainly the truth.

She frowns. 'Why are you looking so alarmed?'

You twist your face into a look of confusion and can only hope it's believable. 'Am I?'

She frowns at you further, then glances back at Hiro. Trying your best to keep your expression innocent, you look at him too, trying to identify any signs that might point to what you two have been up to together. But as far as you can see he looks his perfectly ordinary self. His clothes are clean, his hair perfect and his capable hands are folded in front of him, washed and chocolate-free.

All you can do is go back to your meal, pretending you have no idea what she's talking about. It seems to work. She turns away, resting her chin on her hand as she goes back to talking with you. You struggle to hear anything against the ringing in your ears. You're so stiff your body aches. Who would have though it would take so much effort just to appear normal?

The rest of the day seems to drag by. After all the excitement that morning the afternoon is agonisingly dreary and boring as you sit in front of the T.V, mindlessly flicking through the channels. Is this really how your life was for those two long years?

It's only made worse by the fact that Hiro is so close and you can do nothing with him. Your body trembles at the thought of touching him, holding him, even simply talking with him; your heart races; you feel sick with craving—but you won't do anything. Not while your mother is lurking about. She already suspects something isn't quite right, and there's just no way you're going to prick her suspicions any further.

The only good thing about her return home was her startled cry when you used your rollator in front of her to get from the living room to your bedroom. She was speechless, her hands clapped to her mouth, her eyes brimming with tears. At that point, despite your fears and uncertainties, you could have cried too.

Hiro seems to understand your reticence, working efficiently and professionally and barely talking with you as he helps you with your basic needs. The only time he lets his guard down is when he helps you into the toilet. There, in the privacy of the little room, you kiss. Probably not the most romantic of surroundings but you'll take what you can get.

You whimper as he wraps his arms around you and presses his cheek to your head. Though he's been only metres away from you throughout the evening, you feel like you've been worlds apart. It's only been five hours or so and yet it feels like an eternity. You've never felt this way about a man before. Not even when you were engaged to Alex.

'I can't take this anymore,' you whisper. You're trembling as you clutch him fiercely back. You brush your moist eyes against his shirt. 'Why can't we be alone together? Why can't she just go away?'

Vaguely you recall him saying the same thing. Vaguely you remember how it startled and concerned you. Now you understand how he feels. Was he feeling these kinds of feelings since then? Little wonder he's 'malfunctioning'. You're alive and you feel like you're breaking apart.

He doesn't answer but simply holds you more tightly.

You go to bed early that night, eager to be away from your mother, eager for the night to get properly started. Night means your mother is asleep. Night means Hiro comes to visit.

You close your eyes, doing your best to relax your sore, tired body. Despite what's lying in wait for you tonight, you really need your sleep. Your haven't ached so much in a long time—and you don't mean your usual nerve pain. It's muscle pain. Healthy pain. Hiro might have become lax with his scheduled physiotherapy lately but all the sex you've been having has certainly made up for it.

You hope you ache worse tomorrow.

Rolling onto your side, you force your eyes shut and wait.