TRIGGER WARNING- Mentions of suicide/suicide attempt. It's nothing graphic, but still just a warning.
Also, this chapter ending is horrible, but I weeped writing this and I physically couldn't write any more.
Y/N's P.O.V.
"Hey, kiddo." A voice said as I opened my eyes and I groaned in pain.
"Hi." I mumbled.
"I'm alive then? That's... interesting." Sam and Bucky frowned at my words, but Steve just cleared his throat.
"I'm not saying I don't appreciate it, because I do, but if you do anything that reckless ever again, you're never going to hear the end of it." Steve warned.
"You almost didn't survive."
"That illusion I put up should have lasted until I was dead. How the Hell did you find me?" I asked quietly.
"I broke the illusion." I turned my head towards the voice, seeing Loki, making me laugh a little.
"Hello, love."
"So I'm alive and I'm schizophrenic now. I gotta say, I didn't see this coming." I sighed and they all frowned at me.
"Y/N-"
"No, it's alright." I held my hands up slightly.
"Almost convincing, but Loki doesn't call me love. He never has." I shook my head.
"I thought you'd try and hit me if I called you darling, darling." Loki joked, making me laugh a little.
"Damn, I should have seen this coming. I've finally lost it." Steve looked at me, concerned.
"I knew that spell was dangerous, but I didn't expect it to send me to crazytown. Well, I expected it to kill me, but that's not the point." I sighed.
"I'll be alright. I know the difference between what's real and what's not."
"Do you?" Bucky asked, looking concerned.
"Yeah, of course I do." I rolled my eyes.
"Loki left me. He's not coming back. My sister made sure of that when she tricked him into thinking I used magic on him. Loki hates me. He wouldn't waste his time." I smiled at the trickster, who looked genuinely hurt by my words.
"Y/N, when you healed me... did you know it would kill you?" Steve asked carefully.
"Yep." I sighed.
"But it was me or you, that's not really a decision is it? You're Captain America I'm... I'm the monster everyone always told me I was. I almost had you all killed, I killed my brother, I almost killed my sister, I scared off the one person I've ever really loved and then I locked myself away. Trading my life for yours was probably the best thing I've ever done and I failed at that."
"You love me?" Loki asked in a soft voice, stepping forward. There were tears in his eyes and even though he wasn't really there, it hurt seeing him like that.
"Yeah. I do." I nodded my head and the doors opened, revealing Thor.
"You're awake!" Thor's voice echoed loudly in the small room as he came towards me, standing next to Steve and blocking my view of Loki.
"Thor." Steve said in a warning tone, stepping forward and pushing Thor back a little.
"I'm fine." Thor shook his head, smiling slightly.
"It's okay." I looked at them in confusion, before Thor looked at me with a slight glare.
"Do you know how dangerous what you did was? Are you stupid?"
"A bit, yeah." I smiled at him, despite his glare.
"Hey, if you're going back to Asgard, can you give Loki a message? Can you tell him I'm sorry? I kind of almost died and if I owe him an apology."
"Loki?" Thor asked and I nodded my head, he looked at the others.
"You didn't tell her?"
"Tell me what?" I asked in confusion.
"Y/N." Bucky looked at me, putting his hand over mine.
"When he found you, you were almost gone. There was no way of saving you."
"When who found me?" I asked carefully.
"Me." Loki smiled, now at the end of my bed amd for a moment, I thought he was real. He looked real enough, he sounded real too.
"Heimdall sensed the magic you used from Asgard. He said it was killing you, so Loki and I came as fast as we could, but there was nothing that we could do. Loki was the one who found you and before we could stop him, Loki replicated the magic you had already used." Thor spoke in a whisper, tears in his eyes.
"I don't understand." I shook my head.
"Loki is here?"
"Y/N, Loki died as soon as he completed the spell." Sam whispered.
"He traded his life for yours."
"Oh." I mumbled. I looked at the trickster at the end of my bed, frowning.
"So you really aren't here?"
"I'm afraid not, darling." He sighed.
"I thought you knew the difference between what's real and not?"
"Yeah, well, I was kind of hoping someone was going to correct me and say that you really were there." Loki chuckled at that.
"Y/N?" Thor asked.
"Who are you talking to?"
"Loki." I smiled, looking at the blond prince.
"But he's not really there, I just want him to be."
3rd P.O.V.
The Avengers never thought they'd find themselves in Asgard. Wanda and Nat had joked about going for Y/N and Loki's wedding once or twice, but they never imagined going there for a funeral.
Everyone was silent as the heroes and the Asgardians looked at the two boats as they passed. The first held Loki, Prince of Asgard, who died from fatal wounds whilst on Earth.
The second held Y/N L/N, Avenger, who took her own life 3 days after Loki died.
Everyone cried that day, even Odin shed a few tears for his son. Asgard mourned, but so did Earth.
Earth lost a hero, a protector. The Avengers lost a friend. A member of their family.
