Identical halfsisters

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Who is to be blamed? Me or mom? I don't know who to blame but I must find someone soon or I will never be in peace. I wish she was still here, I know she started that chaos but I sometimes think that I drove her to it. We used to be a happy family , at least I thought we were . We could have talked it out only if she told me what went wrong. Mom shouldn't have told us anything, it was better that way. Nowadays I prefer to be told lies than the truth, it never sets anyone free or excites them. THE TRUTH HURTS.
I wish we weren't from the royal family , only if she didn't accept that marriage proposal, she knew that it would hurt me but still, she did it.Was she supposed to put her happiness before mine?    
I love my mom but I am glad that she is not here today to see what I had done, to mourn for her child. She really loved her maybe I am being silly, Mazindwa Rhavhele  loved us all. I blame my mom, my dad and myself but those were her choices. Is there anyone else to blame? I think I should just tell you the whole story from the time my mom was still a teenager , she used to tell us this story all the time but she never told us that it was her story, I guess she was ashamed. It feels like it was yesterday but it was 40 years ago. One thing's for sure I wish I was never born.

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