Skylar's Wish • Rooster

Chapter 15: Missing

"Dagger 2 is hit." What no... He can't be. He was just behind us. I whip around in my seat, seeing that it's true, Rooster's jet isn't behind me anymore. "Skylar-" Phoenix voice rings through my ears. "No," my voice comes out weak. "No," Tears start to reform in my eyes. "No!" I remove my left hand from the flight control and bang it on the canopy glass. Anger fills my veins. Am I not good enough for him? What was he trying to prove? That I was right about letting him in. My biggest fear, one of us wouldn't come back from this mission. I never should have said that forever bullshit. He broke my heart into a million pieces. I was hoping he was different from the others I brought home. He was supposed to be my forever.

...

I ignore the yelling of my fellow pilots as I angrily march off the deck and to the locker rooms. I push open the door so hard that it hits the wall behind it. I walk over to my locker as the door slams shut. I did it, my goal was achieved. Fanboy is back on the carrier, safe and sound. But why did it cost me everything - everyone, I care about. My uncle, the person who was supposed to be there for me in my biggest moment, standing in my father's place. And the love of my life, stupidly went to find Maverick and got shot down.

Tears start flowing down my cheeks. I don't move to stop them. I hear the locker room door open and the sound of footsteps walking towards me. I feel two arms pull me closer to their chest. I sink further into their chest and let out all my tears. Their hand comes up to my hair and gently starts playing with it. "I'm sorry, Sky. I'm so sorry." Phoenix's voice rings through my ears. Why me? What did I do so wrong that this universe hates me? Why did they have to take all the important men in my life? Wait...

I abruptly stood up, Phoenix arms falling to the bench where I was just sitting. I shove my helmet into my locker and slam the door shut. I turn and walk out of the locker room, tears still streaming down my face. I hear Phoenix yell my name from behind me, but I ignore her. I walk up some stairs, make a few turns, go down some stairs, go straight down a hallway, then up a shit ton more stairs. All while getting sorry looks from passing people.

I finally arrived at the door I've been wanting. I open the door, not caring to knock. "Lieutenant! You can't be here!" Admiral Bates says. Everyone stops what they're doing to stare at me as I make my way to the man standing in the corner. I stop in front of him. I open my mouth, but no words come out. He sends me a sad smile. My body is frozen in place, I can't move. "Hondo..." He wraps his arms around me. His touch feels nothing like my father's or Maverick's or even Rooster's. But I feel comfortable in his arms. I find myself leaning into my chest. He doesn't say anything, he just holds me. He doesn't smell like anyone I know, but it's a comforting scent - he smells like wood from a wet forest. Eventually, both Admirals have given up on getting me out of there. And all the tech people have returned to work. I just stand there wrapped in Hondo's arms.

And so, we stand there, for seconds, minutes, hell maybe even hours. Either Hondo or I move. My mind is racing, half of me what's to get back in an F-18, and fly until I find them, or I get shot down. But the other half reminds me that my mom is waiting for me to come home. My brother, my nieces, my Best friend. I can't leave them, especially after we just lost our dad.

I stand there sniffling, clinging onto Hondo with all my might. I listen to his heart, the typing, and mumbling of the tech guys. I feel my eyes slowly closing, my mind suddenly replaying everything that has happened in the past few months. Me walking into my Captain's office. Flying back home to California. Seeing my family. Meeting my fellow pilots. Seeing Maverick and Rooster for the first time in years. Training for this mission. Expressing my feelings for Rooster. Training some more. My dad's funeral. Realizing, all of my feelings for Rooster have returned.

Then this mission. Feeling the pressure build up in my head. As I turn each corner and the climb over the mountains. The sound the SAMs make as they shoot off and into the sky. The beeping of the radars. Watching in slow motion Maverick destroyed one of those SAMs that was on Rooster tail, but then watched Maverick's plane get hit. Seeing it spin out of control with smoke and flames. Hearing that, Rooster was shot down. That feeling of numbness I felt.