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Chapter 15

Lily's POV

"Hello" I spoke as he answered the call.
"Hey Lils" He said groggily over the phone.

It was silent, so silent you could hear a pin drop.

"So urm, how are you?" He asked.
"I'm good, feeling a bit shit but good. How are you?"
"Erm yeah, still in shock over the whole... you know" He paused as I butted in and said "The baby".
"Yeah, the baby. So is everything okay?"
"Perfect, I'm 15 and a bit weeks"
"Lily? Can I... maybe come over? I think this is a conversation we need to have in person" As much as I didn't want to see him, I knew I had to for the sake of our baby.
"Yeah, I'll be home anyway"
"Cool, I'll uhh go get dressed. I'll see you soon then." He said before hanging up.

As the call ended I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding, that was probably the most awkward conversation I've ever had in my life.
JJ knocked on my door 25 minutes later, I welcomed him in and we sat facing each other on opposite sofa's.

"So urm, When did you find out?" He asked as he looked at the small bump peaking through my top.
"Ibiza, we all took tests and well two were positive. Didn't properly find out until we were home though"
"Who else knows?" He asked again.
"Well the girls obviously, Harry and I'm guessing Josh and Simon know too"

"So wait when you were sick during the um...you already knew?"
I knew he was referring back to the argument and the break up but I'm so glad he didn't actually say those words, I tried my hardest to forget about that day.

"Yeah, I'd tried so many times to tell you but the moment was never right and I'm sorry for that, you deserved to know sooner and I was just being selfish"
"Why are you apologising? I'm the one who screwed up. You had every right not to tell me I was a dick" He chuckled slightly as he moved over to my couch and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

"I'm sorry Lily, I'm such a fucking prick" He spoke up after we sat in silence for a while as I cried onto his shoulder.
"Why? Why did you do it?" I asked looking up at staring at him.
"Honestly, I really don't know. I was drunk and... I know being drunk is no excuse but I don't even remember it. I'm just so fucking sorry" He breathed.

"It's okay, I've got bigger things to worry about Jj. I...I forgive you".

I didn't know if it was a good thing or not to forgive him this early, I mean I'd make him work hard for my trust again. This wasn't me agreeing to a relationship but I needed him, our baby needed him.

"Can I ask? Are you keeping the baby?" He asked me.
"Of course I am"
"Well, I'm gonna be there for you Lils and our baby" He placed a hand on my stomach and with his other hand hugged me.

"I've got a scan In a few weeks If you'd like to come?" I asked as the appointment popped into my head. He agreed thankfully, I felt bad for constantly asking Jade to be there when she had her own life to think about and her own baby now.

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•A few weeks later•

Jj had barely left my side, he was constantly around at my house or I was at his flat. I would say things were back to normal but they were far from it, normal for us was being together, getting drunk and going to parties but now we were simply just two friends having a baby together. I honestly still didn't know what to think of the situation, I was still in complete disbelief that there was a baby growing inside of me and in a few months time I would be a full blown mum. I still felt like a kid myself and sometimes even still acted like one.

Jj and I sat in the waiting area at the baby scanning centre. He was like a kid on christmas morning, he wouldn't stop bouncing his leg and talking about how excited he was, while I was shitting myself.
Earlier that day we had finally made the decision to keep the gender a secret for now and instead have a gender reveal which we had already organising for Saturday afternoon.

"Miss Roberston? Would you like to come through?" I heard as I looked up at the woman calling my name. We followed her through the doors and she directed to me to the bed.
"Right so, you're about 18 weeks now?" She asked as she squeezed the jelly onto my stomach and began the scan. I replied to her question as stared at the large tv screen waiting for the baby to pop up.
Jj's face lit up the moment our baby came on the screen.

"There we go" The sonographer said as she pointed at the screen.
"Do you want to know the gender?" She asked as she began taking photos.
"Can you write it down for us instead please?" I asked her as I looked over at Jj who was beginning to tear up.
"Jide, You okay?"
"Urm, yeah I've just got something in my eye" He replied as he wiped the tears away.
I laughed and looked back at the sonographer as she put a little piece of paper into an envelope.

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"Jide are you sure you're okay?" I asked as we sat in his car eating a mcdonalds. Apparently I loved getting Mcdonalds after I have a scan. Anyway this man had not stopped crying and he stared at the scan photo the whole time.
"I'm good" His reply was as he stuffed some chips into his mouth.
"Are you sure? You know you have tears rolling down your face" I pointed out laughing as I took another sip of my drink.
"I just can't believe it" He replied as he continued staring at the photograph.
"You can't believe it! I have a growing human inside me" I exclaimed whilst laughing.

The ride home was silent, Jj wouldn't stop crying so I drove. I thought about a lot of things on the drive home, would it ever be the same between us? Would we ever get back together or would we just co-parent?
I knew it would take me a long time to trust him again and I also knew that we could never just be friends. In the short time Jj and I were together, I really did find myself falling completely in love with him and everything he did and in the time we had been apart those feelings had never left.

"I'll get an uber back home" I announced as I pulled his car into the car park beside his flat.
"Don't be stupid, I'll drive you back later. Come up" He told me as he unbuckled his seatbelt and opened the passenger door.
I hesitated for a moment before following his actions. It was a short walk from the car park to his flat.

"Si! You here bro!" Jj shouted as we walked into their home.
"In here!" I heard as we began following the voice.

"Hey Lily, congratulations!" Simon said standing up and walking towards me, his arms open wide.
"Ah thank you Si" i replied as I was welcomed with a hug.

The three of us sat around the tv in their living room. Simon and Jj were watching a football game that was on and I sat pretending I knew what was going on.
Jj dropped me off at my house a few hours later.
"So I'll see you Saturday then?" He asked as I exited his car.
"Erm yeah or whenever, I never do anything these days anyway" I chuckle replying to his question.
"I'm recording with the boys tomorrow, I'll come over after?"
"Sure, Goodnight Jide" I waved as I began walking towards my front door.
"Night Lils"