Home for the Summer (BOYXBOY)

Mountains Between Us: Part 3

Trigger warning for this chapter! Please scroll down to the author's note at the bottom for more details.

At some point, I stepped out of Nico's room to look for Jackie, who was standing just below the waiting room window and smoking a cigarette. I didn't think anyone my age actually smoked. She looked stressed.

"Hey," I said, closing the door behind me and stepping toward her. We stood at the cusp of a memorial garden that was completely iced over. I was freezing, but Jackie seemed fine.

"Hey."

"So," I said. "Are you alright?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"You seem upset."

"You don't know me."

"I know when someone's upset."

Jackie looked at me before taking a long pull of her cigarette. "He might have to stay here."

"Yeah, I've heard. Is that such a bad thing?"

"You think he should stay here?"

"I mean, if he's getting the help he needs and it's of his own volition-"

"You weren't there the first time," she said. "I was. And it was... It was bad."

I blinked. "Worse than now?"

"He didn't want to stay. He begged not to stay, but they had to keep him there. He was a danger to himself, and they forced him into it. So, him getting better? It was sort of set up for failure."

"I think Nico's changed. He might be okay with staying now."

"Nobody's okay with staying in a place like this, Ollie. That's not why you stay here." She stomped her cigarette out under a boot. "He's devastated."

"He's going to be okay."

"You don't know that."

"He has you, and his mom, and I'm here."

Jackie looked at me for a beat before her eyes brimmed with tears and she covered her face with her hands. "This is all my fault."

I didn't know what to say. Her shoulders shook as she cried and all I could think to do was step closer to her. "Hey... It's okay, Jackie. It's gonna be okay."

"I was supposed to know when he was getting bad again. I hadn't been paying attention."

"It's nobody's fault," I said. She wiped the tears sitting below her eyes before staring up at the sky.

"I should've talked him out of joining hockey again. I had a feeling it would be bad, but.... But he seemed so happy." Her words were muffled through tears. "And now, he's lying in a hospital bed because of me."

I looked at the sky with her for a beat. "He's lying in a hospital bed because he's sick. It has nothing to do with you, or me, or Nico. Sometimes, the universe is shitty."

Jackie smiled a little at that before bending down and picking up her cigarette butt. "Nicolas would be pissed if he knew I was smoking."

"I won't tell."

She let out a breath, shaking her head to no one. "I wish things were easier."

"Tell me about it."

"Why can't hospitals just... Work the first time?"

I gave her a shrug. "Life happens."

"Life is such shit."

"It gets better."