the place they sent me

Snapped and slipped

First things first. Hi I'm alive lol I'm so sorry I like never update haha. Anyway I've got like 3 weeks off that I'll try to update during and do lots of writing so I'll have some drafts to post when I'm busy again. But anyways on with the story, because I know y'all been waiting.

~ASHER'S POV~

After Dylan told me to stay everyone sat down at the table, Dylan putting me between him and Matt with Peter opposite of me. We all sat in silence, I don't know if they where expecting me to talk first or like something so I just sat there looking down at the table and picking at the hem of my shirt.

"So Asher would you like to talk first or would you like one of us to. Keep in mind we are all going to want to get to know you if you are going to be living here and we would hope you would want to know us" Matt calmly says to me, giving me the option on what I wanted to do.

"Please c-can someone else g-go first, i-i-if that's ok" I muttered out shyly still not looking at anyone

"Of Course kitten" I hear Dylan agree from beside me before I feel a hand under my chin making me look up at them, it was Peter he was leaning across the table just so he could make me look at them.

"Look at us when talking, it's rude to not look at a person when speaking little one" Peter states with a commanding tone in his voice.

"Ok I'll go first" Dylan states drawing my attention away from Peter and the other boys next to him. "Kitten, Peter informed Matt and I that you where climbing the tree in the back yard despite the instructions you where given?" Dylan half asked half stated.

"I d-didn't mean to b-bother anyone m'sorry" I struggled to get my sentence out with tears welling in my eyes, I looked away out of habit.

"Don't worry about it sweetheart, we just don't like when you guys climb the trees. You could get hurt and we don't want that do we?" Matt spoke up grabbing my chin and making me look up like Peter had done previously "stop looking away pretty boy, we don't want to look rude now do we" Matt finished his previous sentence causing me to blush at the new name he gave me.

"P-pretty boy?" I whispered, mainly to myself although I knew the others heard as a small chuckle came from a few of them.

"Ok, ok my turn. Baby do you know if you're a little, hmm?" Ethan enquired, sweetly. Although I didn't understand what he meant.. A little? Um no I'm a person I think idk what he was asking so I just shrugged my shoulders slightly.

"Ethan, not right now. We will find out eventually, don't confuse him" Harry scolded, speaking up for the first time since we sat down.

"Ok boys, that's enough we can find out more later right now it's Asher's turn to ask" Matt shots the boys a look that, looked like an end of discussion type of thing. "Asher, sweetie it's you're turn to ask" Matt finished making everyone look and me causing me nervousness to spark up again.

"I um o-ok. W-what is this place, is it l-like some m-mental i-institution" I don't know if that was the right thing to ask, is it going to offend anyone oh god I shouldn't of spoke.

"Well no, this is a place that you will receive guidance, and help. But we are also very close to each other here and we don't call it that, this is a home to some of the boys here and when you are old enough to decide if you want to stay you will have that choice, unless we think you could be a danger to yourself" Matt explained, although his eyes scanned over the other boys. I'm assuming I might of upset someone.

"O-oh m'sorry if I o-offended anyone." I quickly apologize feeling bad now that he explained they where like a family. "Um w-why am I h-here, I'm a g-good kid I p-promise" I half ask half assured.

"I'm sure you are kitten, but you also have struggles and need some extra support that you couldn't get back home" Dylan softly told me, his hand finding its way to my knee, slowly siding up so it was resting on my thigh. 

"O-oh, I'm n-not that bad, I d-dont want the h-help. Thank y-you tho but c-can you send m-me back h-home" I looked away feeling as though I was a bad person for refusing there help.

"Don't be an ungrateful shit!" Peter yelled at me standing up "we took you in even tho we didn't have to, but Matt would of felt bad if we didn't because you're so called fucking parents where going to put you back in the fucking system if we didn't offer our home you little fucking shit!" Peter then walked out. Tears started streaming down my face as I pushed Dylan's hand off me and ran to my room, hearing Matt call after me and Dylan yell at Peter to come back to the kitchen. When I reached my room, I pushed my dresser in front of the door, then just feel down crying my eyes out and hyperventilating. Not even a few seconds after, I heard noise outside the room, and realised someone was trying to get in.

"G-go aw-away" I called to the person, my voice breaking. I hear two voice's talking on the outside of the door.

"He said go away Matt, give him some space" a muffled voice said, I think it is Harry's

"No Harry, I can't leave a new person, who I know has depression and a history of suicidal tendencies alone, when he's scared, upset, in a new place and obviously isn't aware that he is a little. You know this love!" Matt responded in an attempted hushed voice although he wasn't very quiet at all.

"Fine, do you need help getting the door open I'm pretty sure he's jammed it shut with something" Harry offered

"No, um go find Dylan, Peter and Ethan. Then tell Dylan I want his help and you stay with the other two, make sure Peter has calmed down and let him know he is most definitely not of the hook for this" Matt command with a tone that was leaving no room for argument not like Harry would of anyway. I'm just a useless, ungrateful, selfish faggot who was never wanted. Just at that moment I remembered the little pouch hidden away in my suitcase. Digging in that little section of my suitcase I found my little pouch, but I also felt something else there and then I remembered, I used to hide cigarettes in there. Pulling out the cigarette packet I open it and find 4 left and a lighter in the box as well. Pulling out one of the four and lighting it immediately taking a long drag out of it. I walk over to the window only to discover it won't open more the 5cm but that is enough to get rid of the smoke. I put the little pouch away in my pocket, I decided I would only smoke this time only harm myself one way at a time. All of a sudden I hear scrapping, turning around with the cigarette in my hand, still being held up to ready to take a drag out of it, when Dylan pushed the door again opening it enough for him and Matt to fit through it, my heart skipped a beat knowing I was caught but silently happy that I hid my blades.

"What the fuck, Asher put that out right now or I swear!" Dylan's raised voice rings through the room and he turns to close the door. Pulling my sleeve up I put the cigarette out on my arm not really caring about the scar that will be left or the scars that are on display.

"No, don't you understand Asher, we are responsible for you and everyone else in this house. We have someone with a drug addiction, that fucking cigarette could send him into a relapse" Matt exclaimed highly aggressively, this caused me to break down again today I fell to my knees and just cried, swinging my head back to hit the wall repeatedly.

"Oh shit, baby stop please" Matt walks over and crouched down putting his hand between the walls and my head. Dylan mumbled something to himself before walking over to me and softly grabbing my hand and unwrapping the fist I was holding the cigarette packet and lighter in before putting it in his pocket.

"Kitten, breath you need to calm down please. We can talk and I can help with your burn but please calm down" Dylan replaced Matt's hand behind my head, Matt then picked me up slightly and pulled me into his lap rocking me back and forth, somehow calming me down. My eyes fluttered shut then open again trying to keep myself awake.

"M'sorry, I d-didn't means to m-makes you sads, won't hate m-mes pwease" I muttered out slurring my words although it felt right, I felt happy for the first time in a long time and then I was asleep.

Hey my little elf's, did you enjoy this chapter, I really hope you did, the photo up top is Alex when they walked in haha. Please leave comments they make me feel all like giddy and shit. Anyways I love y'all have a nice day/night and eat, drink, and sleep well my lovely's.