Murder, Talk no Jutsu and Other Easy Solutions

Of Training Montages, Clusterfucks and Hiding Bodies

It had been several days since the bell test and since Kakashi had resigned himself to his fate of being Maria di Angelo's 'sensei' (Read: bitch). That being said, his fate wasn't all bad. He got the chance to connect with Naruto (a chance he was taking time and time again by telling the boy stories about his parents and taking him out for the occasional ramen bowl at Ichiraku's. He was so glad Naruto's favorite restaurant was one of the few restaurants in the village that didn't have a 'No Jonin Allowed' sign in the window because of all the shit Anko had pulled over the years. Just because she didn't pay for her food doesn't mean he wouldn't, damn it).

Kakashi also found a kindred spirit in Sasuke. The kid was quite a bit like him at that age, plus or minus a few pyromaniac tendencies and overall better mental health. The kid wasn't revenge crazed or prone to brooding. In fact, he didn't even seem all that mad at Itachi the few times he was brought up. It made Kakashi curious, but he knew better than to pry. They were demons, but they were still his students and he cared. The last thing he wanted was to give them trauma.

Sai and Mizuki were still the most normal of the group, if a bit... closed off. Sai had yet to give anyone who wasn't Maria, his brother, Sasuke or Naruto a real smile. It was clear Kakashi was going to have to earn his smile privileges, which was something Kakashi could accept.

Mizuki was the weirdest one. He was exactly as his file had said he was going to be, which was an automatic red flag. No one's file was a hundred percent accurate, and when it was, it was usually because the person was playing a part. Kakashi wondered why the Chunin would need to put on an act, and while it was clear his loyalties lied with the team, the situation was still disconcerting. But Kakashi knew he had no right to make accusations, so he would keep his mouth shut... for now.

Maria was still Maria. Chaotic, loud, talented, cunning, beautiful, sexy... Kakashi had to shake himself out of his reverie when he realized he was staring at Maria's ass from across the training ground as she chatted happily with Mizuki, looking completely content just talking to him. Yet another reason Kakashi didn't like the man.

Kakashi was caught between a rock and a hard place on the subject of Maria. On the one hand, she was his tormentor who had put him through nothing but hell since they had met. On the other hand, she was hot and had quite a few redeeming qualities. And she was his best student. She was like a cute little racoon that had made its home in his yard; annoying, but he liked it too much to do anything about it.

Training the last few days had been a speedrun of all the basics every self-respecting shinobi needed to know to kick ass. The team had focused on Taijutsu at first and after that, weapons. Kakashi shuttered at the memory. That had been a very... interesting lesson.

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A few days ago

Kakashi smiled down at his students (including Mizuki, who had been more of a student than an assistant since he joined the team. He certainly hadn't helped him much).

"Alright you little monsters, since you've all mastered the Taijutsu forms I've taught you, I've decided to start helping you learn how to wield weapons. I want each of you to pick out one weapon you would like to learn and bring it here tomorrow.", he requested, because Maria had made it damn clear he wasn't the one giving the orders.

The next day, each of his students had come to Training Ground Seven hiding something behind their backs, which in Kakashi's experience, was never a good thing when it involved these people. But he let it slide, since he had asked them to bring something that day.

'Maybe this will go well.'

It didn't.

"Alright brats, on the count of three, I want you to show me the weapons you chose. One... two... three!", Kakashi counted down once all his students were seated in a semicircle in front of him. Once the countdown was finished, they all pulled out their weapons. Naruto pulled out a tanto (unexpected choice, but okay), Mizuki pulled out a windmill shuriken (he expected that from his file), Sai pulled out a pair of... Well, sai (he honestly had no expectations for the boy, but was thankful it wasn't some torture device), Maria pulled out two kunai attached by a reinforced chain (thank gods it was semi-normal), and Sasuke pulled out...