Bet We Could Make Some MORE (History Huh?)

21: Barrel Rolls (Henry)

They are able to change their flight tickets to fly out later that day. They don't talk while they pack their bags. They leave out a change of clothes for the airport and go down to the beach. Henry expects Alex to set himself up in a lounge chair, and doesn't expect him to get up for many hours. But as Henry sits down on one of the chairs, Alex holds out a hand.

"Will you go for a walk with me?" Henry looks up at the copper-skinned man, with his dark curls. He grabs his hand. For the first time in a while, it feels like there's a spark between them where their hands meet.

They walk down the beach like that, hand-in-hand. Alex is unusually quiet. He's almost always cracking a joke or complaining about the campaign. Henry has never had to fill the silence, he doesn't know how to. So they walk in silence, but the air between them is different, as if thinner. Henry had let Alex in, Alex is starting to let Henry, though there is still that final piece to fall. But for now, it is comfortable.

The breeze is light. The ocean nips at their heels with each wave. The sand molds to the shape of their feet with each step. They walk and walk. Henry knows they have hours until they have to leave for the airport, and still, it feels like they have walked so long they wouldn't make it back in time. Time is suspended, Henry has no idea how much has passed. The sky is still bright with the light of day.

Alex stops. He turns towards the ocean. Henry takes this opportunity to look back, and he can't even see the hotel in the distance. There's no one in this part of the beach. It's narrow, between a low rock wall that leads up to the road and the water, only maybe 20 feet wide. Alex continues to stare out at the never-ending blue. He finally drops Henry's hand.

"I'm so sorry, Henry," he says with his hands in his pockets, still staring at the ocean. "I don't think I can say it enough." Finally, Alex turns to face him. His eyes are dry. Good, Henry could barely stand to see Alex weep again over Henry's secrets. He shouldn't have let it get this far. Yes, he blames Alex, a big part of him is still very mad at Alex, but he has to give Alex a chance to explain, for now, they are in limbo.

"I..." Alex starts slowly, turning back towards the ocean. "I want to tell you. Everything." He sighs and drops his head. He gives it a little shake. Henry knows him, and he knows Alex is fighting with himself right now. That in that head of his, is a war. And the only one losing is Alex. Alex always had to be fighting, whether that is the defense lawyer or a political reveal or just his overworked laptop, and if there was no one left to fight, he would fight himself. Only this time, Henry is really afraid he's going to end up tearing himself into pieces.

"Alex... whatever it is, you can tell me." Silence. This time it is full of nervous energy. Surely whatever it is Alex is hiding, it must be bad. "Are you cheating on me?"

"What?" Alex turns so quickly, it's like the flash of a whip. "Never. Henry, I would never do that to you."

"I didn't think you could... but Alex, you're being so... mysterious. Whatever it is then surely can't be that bad. Tell me."

Henry watches as Alex turns both hands into tight fists, his head hung low, he shakes it. "I... I can't... It's not about us. It has nothing to do with us. It's about me. And you'll never see me the same way again."

"I will always love you though, Alex. Always. That is the vows we made. I meant it. Even though it was scary with all the people and the cameras, I meant every word. And I know..." Henry lifts a hand to softly cup Alex's cheek. "I know you did too. I'm sorry I doubted you there, for a second. I'm just... you got me twisted in knots here."

"I'll explain everything when were home," he finally says, looking up at Henry. "Just please, don't hate me." Henry can see the rest of what Alex wants to say in his eyes: don't leave me. Henry won't. He knows, somehow, they'll make it through.