Voiceless Soul

Chapter 14: Past memories. Scars.

Warnings: Alcoholic beverages aftermath, hungover, sickness, drug after effects, mention of vomit, scars, past childhood abuse, violence, and trauma, self inflicted scars, trauma after the almost r*pe incident.

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Chapter 14: Past memories. Scars. 
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Yoongi stayed awake the rest of the night until the sun came out. As he had predicted, Hoseok was so intoxicated he woke up an hour later gagging. Yoongi had carried him to his bathroom where Hoseok had spent the last hours, till the next day. 

He had been throwing up, Yoongi remained by his side helping him, cleaning him, patting his back, rehydrating him just to start again. Hoseok didn't remember much, he saw everything and understood everything as if it had been through a veil, some shadows of the truth reached his consciousness, but he didn't know what was real and what a dream. 

Next morning found Yoongi sleeping, sitting down resting his back  against a wall in the cold with the clothes he had been wearing the night before, and with Hoseok sleeping over his legs in a small pillow and a heap of blankets  from his bed. He had brought it once he understood they weren't going to move soon from the bathroom. 

Yoongi's head hurt the second he opened his small eyes, the sun going through his small broken window hurt his eyes. He felt his back sore, and he stretched slightly feeling each bone cracking. He felt something heavy on his legs, and when he looked down he found Hoseok. 

Clearly his nightmare had been real. He sighed feeling destroyed and hungover. He hadn't slept at all, he barely slept two or three hours that night, in small intervals while Hoseok fainted or fell asleep. 

Yoongi looked down, Hoseok looked like a small broken doll, pale, sad, and sick. He saw the white hairs all tangled. He took his hand and caressed his hair and cheeks. His skin felt warm, and his hair soft. 

Hoseok slept peacefully, his stomach had calmed down somewhere around 5 in the morning. It was 6:00 and Yoongi felt the worst had passed. 

Yoongi left Hoseok on the floor, he lifted himself up, and went to do his stuff hoping Hoseok wouldn't wake up, he didn't. Yoongi then picked Hoseok and carried him in his arms. He placed him inside his bed, he covered his cold body with the blankets and covers. He looked so pitiful and small there. 

Yoongi went to clean the bathroom just in case, and then took a quick shower. He brushed his teeth and dressed himself in some comfortable clothes, he went out, and made sure Hoseok was still asleep. 

He left a small bell he had lying around, with a note. [Use this to call me if you need me. I'm in the kitchen. I'll come. There's a trash can beside the bed.] 

He then went to the kitchen, he wanted to prepare something for both of them, they deserved some nourishment after that hard night. 

While he cooked a light breakfast, he thought on how his perspective about Hoseok had totally changed, he didn't felt like hating him anymore, after what he had discovered of his past, he understood Hoseok had been damage and that was why he acted the way he did, and as he also had his own dark past, he thought that finally he knew more of the real Hoseok and that he could finally trust him more. 

He felt something different for Hoseok, like some kind of complicity in life, like partners in crime against darkness, pain and a journey of self love and rediscovery. Yoongi felt strange, even though he was drunk last night, and currently hungover, he still had seen something different he had never seen in Hoseok, and something he hadn't seen in Hoseok's best moments. 

When Hoseok had been that rich annoying kid, who had everyone's sympathy, and who dressed in luxury and arrogance, he had found him ugly, annoying and hateful. But now when Hoseok had been at his lowest and more vulnerable state, and he had seen the real Hoseok, behind all the expensive brands, money and arrogance, was when Yoongi had managed to see beauty in him, in his vulnerability, in his scars, pains and sufferings.