I'm a kind who speaks a lot less than i think. hoarding so many words and world's for so long now I want to let down. maybe cause the end is near
or maybe i'm.
12:32 I'm a giver Maybe i was born a giver but i am also quite sure that i might as well was taught to do anything and everything for others. I had holded my fundamentals close for a long time and i never realised that those aren't even my own they are what was handed down to me. I was just recircling their ways in situations that were never similar. Growing up I had all of me cut with a beautiful chef's knife to serve the pieces of myself with the nicest catering and the tastiest toppings and all that is left now are the crumbs. The crumbs they left for me.
so sweet of them isn't it?
Tho I'm no more under this mindset but that is what I was once a girl who didn't knew when to stop And I think my people would feel that too (Some times I do too much, But that's my way of saying i love you) Maybe I'm not the same fighter my forefathers wanted me to be like. But what if I could handle those weapons better in my way, better than them. Invention is just another product of chaos. Although I believe that this guilt would never be lifted up from my heart but still I'm sorry I'm sorry that I never ever was able to become what you wanted me, what i should have been, a perfect girl with everything. but mama what if maybe just in a wildest dream I turn out into something more like me instead, more earthier than that perfect girl i was never able to match?
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But what if I don't? That's the situation that never gets out of my head. what if I'm made to be failed? What if I am like those surrounding streetwalkers in pictures on shelves Those who never mattered enough to remember or even address what if I'm just a side actress? I wish I could have been that perfect main character girly would i be happy then? Would i ? Would you have loved me then?
