Fighting the Stars - A Jack Harries Fanficton

Chapter 18

“You do as I asked?” said James as I got into his car. My eyes were bloodshot and sore from all the tears. I simply nodded, knowing that if I spoke I would begin to cry once more. 

“Good,” he said, tightening his grip on the wheel. “Now, we are going to meet with the vice presidents of my family’s financial corporation. I need you to act professional. Keep your mouth shut, no music talk. If they ask what you’re studying you say language. Am I understood?”

I nodded once more. Sure, I understood his instructions, but I didn’t understand why I had to pretend to be someone I’m not. 

“Baby, don’t pout.” he said, noticing my glum expression. He cupped the side of my face in his palm. “You don’t need that Jake in your life. We’ve got everything! The world is at our fingertips!”

He then reached for my hand, but I snatched it away from him. He glared at me. I didn’t care if this set him off, let him hit me. Maybe this time he’d actually go far enough. That way I’ll never have to deal with it again.

But, he said nothing. Instead, he put the car in drive and took off for the restaurant where we would be meeting. I stared out the window during the car journey. I could only wish that I was out there, instead of in here.

**

I sat in the lecture of my Performance class. Professor Runport had been rambling about stage presence for ages when he finally decided to change the subject. I had been tapping my pencil on my mouth and perked up in my seat.

“Now, this week I want to focus on something a little more challenging. You are all adults, and life is pressing down upon you. It’s time to figure out just who you are. And not just your name, past, and values. I mean what is inside of you. What things make you the way you are?

“By the end of the week, I want you to find - or write - a song that you feel best describes who you are. You will memorize and perform it for the class when you are ready. You will be graded not on how well you sing, but how well you interpret who you are.”

The class was all looking around, racking their brains for a song. But me, I wasn’t looking for any song in particular. How am I supposed to find a song about who I am, when I don’t even know in the first place?

Professor Runport folded his hands together and continued to explain. “Now, this assignment will be more difficult for some than others. I understand. You are still young and figuring out who you are can be somewhat scary. But it’s there inside of you, and it’s waiting to be discovered.”

After class I had another dinner meeting with associates of James. Once again, he made me someone I’m not. But I went along with it anyways.

He had run off with his friends, leaving me alone and restless. Since I couldn’t sleep, I left my room and walked across campus. I stepped onto the familiar crates, but getting on top of the supply shed wasn’t as easy without Jack’s help.

I finally managed to flop myself up there and laid on my back, gazing at the stars. I let out a sigh. It wasn’t the same without Jack here. But, he did say he came here when he needed to think or clear his head. And that’s exactly what I need right now.

Who am I?

Well, I am Sophie Caliway, daughter of an abuser. I was born into wealth. I’m also the future wife of yet another abuser. I am silent.

Yes, that sounds about right.

But, that’s not who I want to be. That’s not who I really am.

The stars in the sky, no one tells them how brightly to shine. No one tells them their place. They do things of their own accord. No one tells them who they are.