Chapter 8

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Chapter 8

 I stop walking and peak my head around the corner. Just as I expected Hannah and Krista are standing in the middle of the hall mindlessly gossiping. I strain to hear what they are saying.

“I can’t believe she even showed up today,” Krista says.

“I know if I was her I would have dropped out of school, she should leave the country,” Hannah says and I can almost hear the sneer on her face. I frown to myself at how easily they threw away my friendship, I knew that I did the wrong thing but I didn’t know it would matter this much.

“She is such a bitch I can’t believe we were ever seen with her.”

“I know right? She was such a good actress; I never knew someone could be that fake.”

I scoff, fake? They thought I was fake? I was never anything but myself with them they knew everything about me. I told them about all my problems I let them cry on my shoulders after each break-up. I was always there for them and after one mistake they couldn’t just forgive me? I was there for them through thick and thin and when I mess up once they completely ditch me. Okay they never did anything as bad as what I did but it wasn’t all my fault.

“Did you see that new girl Trinity or something? She was totally wrapped up in her lies.”

“I know and she was super nice she totally could have been in our group if she wasn’t associated with her.”

Tears well up in my eyes as I hear them refer to me as ‘her’. It was never my intention to hurt anyone. That was the last of my intentions but they never let me explain they just jumped to conclusions.  It wasn’t hard to jump to conclusions it seemed so simple what I did, so horrible. But that wasn’t what it looked like, it was so much more, and they wouldn’t even let me explain.

“I just wish we would never have been friends with her in the first place. I mean we brought her into our group we made her who she was, and she does this?”  Hannah says in such horrible voice that I barely recognise her. I lean my back against the wall no longer interested in what their saying. I can’t believe that they can so easily insult me, that they can close their circle without me in it. I had always thought of us as sisters, everyone had called us sisters and somehow they dropped me. I close my eyes and my head hits against the locker behind me with a quiet bang. A tear rolls down my cheek and I quickly wipe it away, I don’t need to cry anymore I tell myself.

I push myself away from the wall. I don’t need to listen to them anymore, it’s just going to be the same. I remember how we always gossiped but I never thought we said anything as mean as what they were saying about me right now. I am definitely never going to talk about anyone else behind their back like that. I guess being on the other side of things for once really gives you a new perspective.

As I’m walking away from their catty gossip I am overcome with a sudden feeling of nausea and I walk faster to the bathroom down the hall. I throw open the first stall door and unload my stomach into the toilet. Which let’s be honest isn’t much of anything seeing as I haven’t eaten for days. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and push myself up from the floor. This is getting ridiculous. How can I not go two hours without puking my guts up? I wash my hands at the sink and take out the travel sized mouthwash I carry in my bag. Thank god I never empty my bag. Hannah always used to make fun of me for carrying a “twenty pound bag” but in instances like this it’s useful. I pop a piece of gum in my mouth to take away the bitter taste that lingers at the back of my throat.

I look at my phone and see that there is still twenty minutes left of this period. I have no idea what I’m going to do with myself. It’s not like I have friends to go hang out with. I consider texting trinity to ask what class she has but I know that Hannah and Krista have probably already bad-mouthed me and that she probably hates me now. Just like everyone else a voice in my head says and I frown because I know it’s right. This was supposed to be my senior year. It was supposed to be a year full of parties and friends and not worrying about school, but here I am exiled from the rest of the student population.

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