The Secret Lover (ItaSaku)

Chapter 19 - Back to you

"Farewells can be shattering, but returns are surely worse. Solid flesh can never live up to the bright shadow cast by its absence. Time and distance blur the edges; then suddenly the beloved has arrived, and it's noon with its merciless light, and every spot and pore and wrinkle and bristle stands clear." - Margaret Atwood, The Blind Assasin

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**One week later***
Sakura was currently out with Ino, Sai, Naruto, Shikamaru and Choji. They were sitting in a booth somewhere at the back of the bar for intimacy. The pikette sat between Shikamaru and her boyfriend, while the others were on the opposite side. Ino was all over Sai, her lips never leaving his cheek. Choji kept drinking sake after sake mumbling something about everybody getting a partner but him.

"What a drag." Shikamaru commented, supporting his cheek on his palm.

Naruto put a hand around Sakura's shoulders, grinning down at her. She gave him a fake smile and moved her gaze back to the table. Sure, she wasn't alone either, but why ahe felt like that? Why Naruto's presence wasn't enough? Despite all of the things that they've been through as a couple, she still felt like he was a brother to her. Not a lover. She thought at first that she will grow to love him, now that Sasuke wasn't in her heart anymore but she couldn't be more wrong. But the question was why? Why she couldn't love him like he wanted her to?

She often thought about breaking up with him and stopping leading him on but she would break his heart and there would be no one to fill that emptiness.

"I'm going home, tomorrow I have to wait for Temari early in the morning. Troublesome woman." Shikamaru got up from his seat, yawning. "See you!" he waved and exited the bar. Ino dragged a finger across Sai's chest in a seductive way.

"What do you say, shall we go to my place too?" she asked, blushing. He just smiled at his girlfriend.

"Anything you want, beautiful."

They got up from their seats as well and said their goodbyes. Sakura looked outside, through the window, and observed that it was already dark. They were here laughing and chatting since 3 pm.

"They are right, Naruto. We should go too. Choji, thank's for coming. We'll hang out again soon, I hope." she smiled kindly at the chubby man. He nodded.

"Don't worry. I had fun."

The pinkette giggled and got up, taking Naruto's hand and making him blush as always.

***

As they entered her living room, Sakura pushed Naruto on the couch, on his back. Her sudden naughtiness took him aback and made him gasp.

"Sakura-chan?" he asked blushing as she got on top of him, with each leg on  his sides, pulling his collar. Her lips found his and kissed him hungrily like she wanted to get something from that kiss. She needed that spark and she desperately tried to get it but it was futile. It frustrated her. Where was that damned spark? They pulled apart as she ran out of breath. Naruto's eyes avoided hers, being embarassed. Her disappointed look moved to his chest.

"I'm sorry... I don't know what's gotten into me." she said with her voice cracking. Naruto's eyes widened, looking at her tears.

"It's alright, Sakura-chan." he just wrapped his arms tight around her, buring his head into her hair, trying to comfort her. He traced imaginary lines on her back using his fingertips.

The doorbell rang, making them both jump sightly. Naruto put a hand on his chest and exhaled. Sakura used the back of her hand to wipe her tears even though her eyes were puffy. She tried to straighten her clothes and went to open the door.