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Aaina.
We always ask ourself about our life, our priorities. What truly matters to us? What is holding us back? Is it love? Is it care? Is it hate? Is it fear? What is it that's stopping us from breaking down the barriers, from running towards the sunset, from taking over.
One, who figures out what truly matters, is the one who wins. But was I winning? No.
What mattered to me the most? My heart only had one answer.
Zaydaan.
He mattered.
God, he mattered so much. Everything he did affected me. Three nights, he hadn't slept in the same bed with me for three nights now and it was eating me from inside.
I couldn't even sleep right. Just because of him not being there by my side.
So he mattered.
And what else? My education. That mattered to me. But I felt like I was doing so bad in my academic life, I didn't feel as bright and as creative.
And what mattered?
My family mattered.
Abbu mattered. Ammi mattered. Saira and my brother mattered.
My father had hurt me to the core and I still loved him, respected him the same.
Ahad mattered, his friendship mattered to me.
But this new position, of being the first lady. It didn't feel so important to me. It felt almost fake, like I was a trophy wife.
I liked the attention and yet hated it.
Wearing another shalwar kameez that had been replaced by my other clothes in my wardrobe, I walked down the stairs, eyes focusing on the house workers who were cleaning and at the same time, rushing to switch the television on.
I entered the living room, looking at one of the senior employees of the Prime Minister House.
"Good Morning. What's all the commotion about?" I questioned, sitting on the sofa myself and looking at her.
"Good Morning, madam. The Prime Minister is making his first address."
She informed me. Madam. I hated it. I had told them so many times to call me Aaina, even Aaina baji if they didn't want to take my name but they would always deny it.
Zaydaan hadn't addressed the nation yet, not even after taking the oath. People were shocked but I knew he wanted to make it perfect and perfection took time.
"Okay, that's the only way I get to see him anyway." I murmured, my voice barely audible.
I missed him.
"Would you like some tea?"
"That would be lovely, thank you."
One of the girls working in the hall left to fetch me tea while the others continued their work.
