The Lawyer

5-G1

Sophie POV

I stare at the Doctor. Heart pounding.

As promised I have come to get checked due to my sickness bug but I was expecting the standard plenty of fluids and rest advice, not this.

"What?" I ask quietly. My dry mouth has nothing to do with my dehydration now. I had to have misheard that's all, that's what this is.

"Pregnant." She says again. Why does she keep saying that? I can't be pregnant it would mean... No she's wrong that's all.

"I'm on the pill" I say letting her know about her mistake. She smiles softly, as if this is something that happens all the time.

"Have you been well on it? Things can reduce the effectiveness of the contraceptive pill, Sickness, antibiotics, basically anything involving your stomach can reduce its effectiveness." She explains.

I was on antibiotics for my chest infection... and I was sick that day I ran away.

"But- but he pulled out!" I argue, my face growing warm at the admission. But I'm getting desperate for her to understand that this is a mistake, but instead she laughs a little.

"Miss Morley. Surely I don't need to explain how ineffective that method is? I am a little worried about how high the protein in your sample is though. I want you to go up to the Hallamshire hospital. G1 I will call so they expect you. They will check everything is ok and give you something for the sickness."

I walk out of the surgery on auto-pilot. The hospital is not far from where the walk in clinic is so I just keep walking. I am going to get there and they will explain that it's a mistake and everything will be ok.

Before I know it I am facing the entrance to the G1 ward. Gynecology, they're obviously going to know better then the GP. See that it was a false positive. I have to sit in the waiting area for a long time as I can't be admitted without a urine sample, unfortunately I just gave one of those at the walk in clinic and I am dehydrated so I sip water and wait patiently.

When I am finally able to provide the nurse with a sample they lead me through to a private room full of equipment. A bed in the centre facing a TV on the opposite wall.

A Doctor enters with what I assume is supposed to be a reassuring smile. But nothing feels very reassuring right now.

"Your sample showed plus four ketones, that's quite high we would usually admit someone for plus two, so we just need to check how many little ones we are dealing with and then we can give you something to help with the sickness and get some fluids in you." If my mouth could go drier it just did.

"How many little ones?!" I'm sure my face must be a picture of horror right now.

"You're ok," The nurse reassures me, taking me by the hand. I lay back on the bed as instructed and lift my t-shirt grateful that I wasn't wearing a dress. The Doctor tucks some blue tissue along the waistband of my leggings pushing them a little down my hips.

"This might be a little cold" she warns squirting a blue jelly low on my stomach. And spreading it with the sonogram wand. Watching a screen that I cannot see.

"Just the one." She confirms switching on what I thought was the tv the screen. It is filled with a black and white image "and that right there" she says moving the pointer to what looked like a peanut in a bubble, "Is your little one. I would put you at six weeks five days."

"I can't be," I argue even with the evidence before me. "I wasn't with anyone six or seven weeks ago" I explain.

"That is not exactly how it works, the weeks are counted from your last menstrual cycle so when the egg is fertilized that would be two weeks. Does that make sense?" I nod admitting defeat. I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant and it's not to my boyfriend. I am pregnant by a man I am afraid of.

What am i going to do?

The nurse shows me to a ward where instead of beds, there are reclining armchairs. She inserts a cannula into my hand and injects the prescribed antiemetic, she then attaches a bag of fluid feeding the tube through a machine.

"This whole bag will go through in an hour. We will need to do a couple until we get those ketones down. You just lay back and relax" she tells me, pulling the curtain across to give me privacy.

Relax? I don't know if I will ever relax again. I'm going to be a mum...

Keeping the baby isn't a question. I am not anti-abortion I think a woman should be able to make her own choice. My choice is not to have another death on my hands because of Mr Canossa.

How am I going to tell Eddy?

Am I going to tell Matt?

I guess I have to. It's half him, but I can't call him, not yet. If I get through the first trimester ok I'll tell him then. I need to sort myself out first, then Eddy.

The hospital transfer me to a room when it gets late. My ketones haven't dropped as much as they would have liked yet.

They insist I travel by wheelchair despite my protests, apparently my blood pressure is worryingly low.

The Doctor has diagnosed me with hyperemesis gravidarum. Which is the medical term for pregnant and throwing my guts up. If I think my vomiting is getting bad in future I can self-refer back here.

Thankfully the pharmacy has already filled my prescription for Cyclizine, an antiemetic to keep the sickness at bay. I appreciate being under the NHS so paying for the hospital treatment isn't another thing I will need to worry about.

"Try to rest" the nurse says as she leaves my new room. Easier said than done. Even if I could forget everything, I'm attached to a pole that has an alarm which sounds every hour to replace the fluids. And my hand is itchy from the cannula, and I am getting up to pee so much!

After my millionth trip to the ladies room I climb into the bed turning on my phone to let Louise know I won't be home. I haven't told anyone where I am. I can only hope I am discharged before Eddy arrives tomorrow.