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Ms:Anita Betty Carter
Ms:Anita sat across from keisha at her dining room table. She questioned why she felt so sorry for the girl when she knew at firsthand the heartache that came with a parent like this.
Keisha didn't notice the intense stare Ms:Anita was giving her due to her eating her food like a stray dog that hadn't eaten in weeks.
"How long has it been since you've eaten because if you don't slow down your gonna choke so act like you got manners"
Keisha slowed down her pace and swallowed a little slower this go round. " I apologize but Thankyou for this " keisha said with her head facing down.
"If you can ask me for food with your head up I'm more than certain you can say Thankyou the same way"
The way keisha fidgeted everytime she spoke or moved made Ms:Anita skin crawl but she knew that was a sign of judgement so she tried desperately to stop.
"Everytime I help you out I feel like I'm betraying those girls who you left behind and my son" Ms:Anita took a sip of her tea and then continued talking.
"so I don't know how much longer I can help if you don't want the real help because I'm not losing them over someone that can't guarantee me I lost them for a good reason "
"Why is it that everytime I receive some type of help from you or Hakeem YALL HAVE TO-"
"Lower your tone then you may continue" Keisha adjusted her tone " I know who I left behind that night I deal with the guilt everyday"
They heard the sound of a door opening making them both startled. "MA YOU HOME" the sound of Hakeem voice sounded throughout the house.
"Go in that back room the last one on your left" keisha hurried an left the table while Ms:Anita scooted her plate closer to her as if it was hers.
"IN THE dining room what brings you by" Hakeem came into view with a smile plastered on his face " nothing just wanted to see my mama "
He bent down on her level to give her a hug " oh you cooked and didn't tell me or the girls "
"I was gonna call but I got tied up with cleaning this house it just look so discombobulated I got y'all some plates wrapped up there"
Hakeem took a seat next to his mama.Truth is he had a lot on his mind ever since the session with the girls and there wasn't anybody better to talk to than his mama.
"Whats that look about what really brings you by" She knew her son better than he knew himself. " I know you don't like when I speak In this manner -"
"Well I advise you to speak as if you got some sense before you begin" Hakeem took a deep breath before he started to speak.
"I don't think you know how much I hat-" Anita gave him a firm look " I dislike the mother of my kids but the love I have for my girls is unmeasurable and I'll do anything for them to have that relationship with their mom"
"If you heard those girls rap the way I heard them rap yesterday you'll know exactly why I feel the way I feel toward the mother of my kids"
"I promised myself I would never help keisha a day in my life because she chose the life she wanted the moment she walked away from US"
"But in order for those girls to get the closure they deserve I'll put whatever behind her if she go gets the help she needs for our girls"
Anita knew exactly where her son was coming from and she couldn't blame him. "KEISHA" Hakeem stood up with a confuse look on his face but he quickly disguised it with a mug when she came in view.
"I know you haven't been helping her all this time cause you got me all the way bent-"
"And no I haven't been helping her all this time but if I wanted to I could have -"
Hakeem scrunched his face up at his mother response " what you mean you could have no you couldn't cause this tramp don't deserve ISH FROM ME , YOU OR THE GIRLS" this was his defense mechanism.
"You are absolutely right he's right Anita I don't" Keisha spoke quietly but they could hear her. She shivered as she stood behind the chair.
"Look at her just trifling ion know how I fell in love with a skank like you -"
Anita slapped Hakeem across his face "you'll never degrade a women in front of me or in this house at all"
Hakeem nodded his head because he was hurt but he knew he deserved it which he never disrespected women but when it came to her he didn't care.
"Now back to you keisha are you willing to get the help this boy is offering you and Hakeem hand her that blanket behind you "
He got the blanket and handed it to his mama " you is something else " Ms:Anita handed her the blanket. Keisha stood silently trapped in her thoughts.
The silence tugged at Hakeem heart causing him to ask her questions "So you telling me If honesty or leigh or honor was right here in your face begging you to get help you would say-"
Hakeem walked closer to her " you telling me you would break their hearts all over again -" he raised his hand but as quick as he raised it he put it down remembering he wasn't raised like that
"You can't help the people who don't want to be help Hakeem I'm sorry" Anita said while keisha stood back with guilt plastered over her face.
Hakeem finally nodded his head but as he nodded tears started to fall " ITS BEEN TEN MFN YEARS HOW TF YOU STILL NOT READY TO GIVE UP THIS LIFE" he grabbed the closes thing to him which was a glass cup and threw it across the room.
"Wait wait wait Hakeem calm down use your words look at me baby " Ms:Anita walked over to him frantically.
She grabbed her son face making him look directly in her eyes which she regretted because she finally saw the hurt and how heavy it is.
" I want help I need help I'll get help but I'm gonna need that push and that motivation because I can't find it all within myself"
" say no more I'll holla at you ma love you" Hakeem kissed Anita and walked out the door in a rush leaving the two standing there.
"If he gets you this help and you don't take it seriously you don't have to worry about me helping you ever again "
"I know people say do it for your kids but baby try your hardest to find it within to do it for yourself because if you don't it's a waste of time"
"Now you can either stay here and get ready for tomorrow or you can walk out this door and may it be your last night you wash your hands with this life"
