Dark Poems Of A Sad Mind

The old me

As the waves lap by my feet,
a distorted image is all I see.
A reflection but not one of me
my past self is the one I see.

The old me, that didn't feel lonely,
that never did shit and wasn't broken.
The old me, that wasn't so deadbeat
had love in his heart and wasn't so empty.

Wasn't a shell like I am with no feelings
he was fun and had joy and was so carefree,
that was me years ago before life hit me
and the pain that I felt, it changed all these things.

As I stare into my eyes that hold no emotion,
the holes through which I see a soul that has been broken,
I wonder is this me, when did I become broken?

I let life get to me, hence this feeling of distortion
I wish I could go to sleep, but this feeling is a torture
and it's making me feel numb and so devoid of all emotion.

will I survive or become another lost cause?
this I know not but my life's more hurt than comfort,
the tides are coming, and the waves, they have washed me
I'm scared of drowning, but this whirlpool is so cunning,
it lured me in it, I can't get out, no help, I'm sinking
The last thing I see, the old me, I miss him.