Reserve... A Lando Norris Story

Thirteen

As soon as the song ends, I run off the stage and out of the bar through the fire exit. I can't let them see me like this.

My heart begins to thud faster and faster the further away I get from my friends. I can feel the blood pounding in my ears as my hands begin to tingle and shake.

My chest begins to close up and my vision obscures, and I can feel my breath escape from within me until finally I collapse on the floor of an alleyway hyperventilating.

I don't know how long I was there, it could have been a few minutes or a few hours. It's funny how time works when you're having a panic attack.

Oscar finds me eventually, thank god for Find My iPhone eh? Because I certainly had no idea where I was.

He doesn't say anything, just picks me up and loads me into an Uber, stroking my hand softly. We arrive back at my hotel and he guides me inside, still not letting go of my hand.

We eventually get back into my room and he helps me get changed and tucks me into bed.

His phone rings and he answers it immediately. "Yeah she's ok, I'm with her... No, I don't think she's in any fit state at the minute Gio. Probably better off leaving her until the morning... will do. See you soon."

He sits down beside me and strokes my hair, "your brother is worried, and Claudia. And Lando."

Shit. Lando. He can't see me like this.

"You okay now?" He whispers, drawing circles on my arm.

I nod, "thank you Oscar. I'm sorry." I whisper, wiping a tear from my cheek.

Theres a knock on my door which startles me and I jump slightly.

"Don't worry. I'll get it." Oscar offers, heading toward the door and opening it slightly, and I can tell from his distinctive voice that it's Lando on the other side.

His voice is muffled however, and I can't quite work out what he's saying.

"I don't think she wants visitors right now mate." Oscar whispers sympathetically.

"No it's ok. He can come in. He had to find out sooner or later didn't he?" I groan, sitting up in bed and wiping the remainder of my tears away.

"You don't have to do this right now you know Vee." Oscar whispers, but I dismiss him and gesture for him to open the door.

"I'll be down the hall. Ring me if you need anything." Oscar mumbles, heading out of the door and leaving me and Lando alone.

We just stare at each other in silence for a moment, until I attempt to break the ice. "Sorry I ruined your night." I chuckle weakly.

Lando sighs and takes a seat next to me in bed, "you're ok that's the main thing."

"...yeah." I mutter, closing my eyes briefly. "Suppose you want an explanation."

"Only when you're ready." He smiles weakly, wrapping his arm around my waist and kissing my forehead softly.

I take a deep breath a try to compose myself, "I've not been completely honest with you."

"What do you mean?" Lando questions, clearly concerned about what I'm going to tell him.

"Flynn, that guy at the bar. He's an old friend of mine. A couple of years back he introduced me to his brother Leo." I swallow hard, trying to hold back the lump in my throat that's resurfacing. "He was a singer too. And we just sort of clicked, platonically at first. We had a band and everything. But then I fell in love with him. And he fell in love with me."

Lando doesn't say anything, he just listens to me, but I can see the look of concern on his face.

"And he was amazing. I was so happy, and so was he. Well at least he seemed it. But late last year I came home from a meeting with McLaren and I found him." I feel my eyes welling up with tears but I blink them away, I can't break down again.

"You found him?" Lando whispers, trying to make sense of what I'm telling him.

"Hanging from the garage roof, a noose round his neck. And it broke me. I didn't see it coming, no one saw it coming. How could I not see it coming?" Tears begin to fall from my eyes, I can't stop them any longer. "And... I blamed myself. Gio found me a week later. He broke down the bathroom door. The doctors said he found me just in time."

"Valentina I am so sorry." Lando whispers, and I can see tears forming in his eyes.

"I was put in a psychiatric facility, for my own safety. That's why I wasn't at testing." I take a deep breath and wipe the tears from my cheeks.
"And I took a vow to myself, that I'd never let that happen again. That I'd never fall for a co-worker. And then I met you."

We just sit there in silence for a moment, Lando not knowing what to say to me.

I bury my head into his neck, "Seeing Flynn at the bar, all the feelings that I buried deep down in me resurfaced. And I freaked out. I'm sorry I never told you."

"You don't have to apologise for anything. I'm just hope you're okay." He whispers, stroking my hair.

"I will be." I murmer, feeling my eyes getting heavy. "Will you stay please? I sort of don't want to be alone right now."

"Of course. I understand if you don't want to come to Monaco with me." He smiles weakly, lifting my head a little so he can see my face.

I pause for a second, debating whether to say what I'm thinking. But then it comes spilling out regardless. "No, I want to. I really like you Lan."

"Oh so we're doing nicknames now are we?" He teases, chuckling slightly.

"Oh shut up!" I giggle, as I lose myself into his eyes and feel myself inching toward him.

"Valena..." he whispers, as our foreheads are practically touching, "are you sure?"

I close my eyes and nod, as I feel his thumb graze my cheek and it sends shivers through my body.

They're only interrupted by the sensation of his parted lips against my own, tender and soft.

I brush his hair through my fingers, as he groans into our melting kisses.

I don't want this to end.

But it does, and he pulls away, grinning wildly at me. "You don't understand how long I've waited to do that."